Tag Archives: repression

The end of a high flying romance (quarantine)

I have nothing to say to you that could be of any comfort to you. For once, the saying “you reap what you sow” fits good when about you! I don’t feel anything yet, no anger or bitterness or sadness. … Continue reading

Posted in heartache, life and love, loss, lost romance, lost trust, love story, poem in English and Swedish, poem in Swedish translated to English, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, reading life, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Elderly balance (single-leg stance)

When 18 people read my texts I exist. Otherwise it is not much with that, unless I not wake up in the night with cramps in one lower leg, then I surely know I’m alive. I hear on the TV … Continue reading

Posted in about writing, aging, alienation, armed loneliness, authenticity, become old, body image, courage, create life, creativity, culture values, dreamers, fate, fears, fragile, grief, happiness, human cruelty, left aside, living with chronic diseases, loneliness, loners, loss, lost, lost trust, maturity, melancholy, memories, morality, obstacles, old age, opportunities, past, poems by vonnely, politics, poverty, reading life, reality, repression and borders, Short prose, Sweden view, Swedish "culture", Swedish conditions, unhappiness, visionaries, vulnerability, walk of life, walls, with or without you, words, writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Lost love, gloom forever to be

        I never got to know you in this all real world, where one breathe, eat, shit and pay the rent. But still, it was meant to be, you and me. Yet your demanding impatience (as I … Continue reading

Posted in aging, gloom, grief, life and love, loneliness, loners, loss, lost, love story, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, reality, relationships, vulnerability | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Love torn apart

          I wanted your love to be my shelter, a comfort zone, a mine for golden joy to give strength as I’m struggling every month to keep my head above the water having hard times. You … Continue reading

Posted in desirers, dreamers, life and love, loneliness, love story, morality, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, relationships, unhappiness | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

A lonely blues around the corner

The whole fucking me is like an emergency Hole in the heart, the claw of abandonment Easily forgotten, lone blues around a corner He told I’ll love you forever true forever was short like a little star afar that twinkle … Continue reading

Posted in blues, dreamers, gloom, heartache, left aside, loneliness, loners, loss, love poem, missing, poem in Swedish and English, poem in Swedish translated to English, poems by vonnely, Poetry, relationships, romance, sadness | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The desires of the beloved

I imagining having you here with me, touching your naked body unlimited. This even though I, also in the mere thought, shy away from same intimacy from you. Why is obscure, but clearly I cannot talk with you about my … Continue reading

Posted in alienation, armed loneliness, Attraction, authenticity, dreamers, images, life and love, morality, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, prose poem, rebellious lovers | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Morning tea, waking up slowly

When I wake up in the morning, my eyes are tiny reddish in my spongy puffy face, my nose is even bigger and I cough and sneeze and farts. When I hurry to the toilet not to pee in my … Continue reading

Posted in body image, images, life and love, Living with chronic pains, loneliness, love story, obstacles, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, reality, rebellious lovers, relationships, romance | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Mother of five (Mater Dolorosa at Rinkeby)

Mother of five, son why did you not die in my womb? From Rinkeby to Dubai now prison for life for murder? You never came back home, reading your truth in my eyes! Son, you grew up to become a … Continue reading

Posted in darkness, grief, hate, heartache, living in the world, lost, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, politics, reading, sadness, Sweden view, Swedish conditions, to die | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Kindly kill yourself on an unnoticed day

It is a popular game, blaming others! Everyone points fingers at everyone and nobody is good enough: you’re white not good, you’re black not good, you’re a “leftie” not good, a “right-wing” not good, you’re a criminal not good, homeless … Continue reading

Posted in lost, obstacles, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, sadness, to die, vulnerability, with or without you | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Snoppar som stoppar / Dicks that kicks

Dicks that kicks but never lift on their tops what is kind and soft and gives room to all! We see it everywhere how arrogance and selfishness are rewarded and the power is given to those who offends the integrity … Continue reading

Posted in about writing, dreamers, frihet, hope, human rights, lighted candles, living in the world, morality, paradigms, poem in Swedish translated to English, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, politics, prose poem, reality, rebellious lovers, with or without you, words | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Jag trivs bäst bak låsta dörrar med 7tillhållarlås (travesti på Ulf Lundell, Öppna landskap)

“Öppna landskap” (Open landscapes) is a ballad by the Swedish rock icon and author Ulf Lundell. The song is often sung and well known to Swedes, sometimes called “The unofficial Swedish Anthem”. It was released in 1982 but the Swedish … Continue reading

Posted in inspiring music, inspiring songs, living in the world, morality, poem in English and Swedish, poem in Swedish and English, poem in Swedish translated to English, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, politics, repression and borders, Sweden view, Swedish "culture", Swedish artists, Swedish conditions, Swedish souls | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

I know Sophie

I know Sophie, she lives upstairs and sometimes when I meet her at the front door she says a shy “hi” and hastily takes the stair home to her own. Neighbors say she has lived here for a long time … Continue reading

Posted in aging, alienation, armed loneliness, loneliness, loners, lost, old age, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, vulnerability | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The road to hell

The Swedish Democrats (SD) is a nationalist and social conservative political party. It was formed 1988 by people with roots in Nazism and racism, once a small extremist party with no influence but after a couple of decades it changed … Continue reading

Posted in culture values, cultures, immigrants, paradigms, politics, repression and borders, right wing, Sweden view, Swedish "culture", welfare | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Teeth, to be or not to be (Tänder, att vara eller inte vara)

I stared in complete shock at the pieces of plastic in my hand! Then I phoned the dentist office. I visited the dentist the very next day. And I was told that maybe my broken partial denture can be repaired … Continue reading

Posted in aging, Attraction, authenticity, become old, create life, left aside, living with chronic diseases, Living with chronic pains, loners, loss, sexuality, Sweden view, Swedish conditions, welfare | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Carrie Lam says “I am”

Carrie Lam says “I am” and the students at Hong Kong Polytechnic University says “We are” – and they are so far. Who Carrie Lam decides to be, will be a line in the historybook and the face she will … Continue reading

Posted in courage, create life, human rights, living in the world, morality, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, politics | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Ice cream dreams (the end of the road)

  It was down minus 25C in Nikkaluokta last night, that would be alike minus 77 Fahrenheit in USA. There I am it’s only +3C and to me that’s far too freezing cold. I have never been in Nikkaluokta, even … Continue reading

Posted in borders, desirers, life and love, lost, love story, missing, morality, nature, old age, opportunities, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, relationships, Swedish souls, unhappiness, Winter heart, with or without you | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

How many times we split up

            How many times we split up! He never learns. Watch up, sweep up, I said to him. Remember we must tiptoe walk now: maybe the last time that we try to get a future … Continue reading

Posted in dreaming, hope, loss, love story, obstacles, past, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, relationships, romance, sadness, with or without you | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Nuts from Turkey, and the nutcases ruling the world

One of the days in late September I felt a sudden yearning for nuts and I didn’t found any in the pantry and then I realized that it was some time since I ate any nuts at all. Mostly, I … Continue reading

Posted in food, human rights, living in the world, lost trust, obstacles, reading newspapers, visionaries | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Since she left me lastly (part 2)

          Since she left me lastly I rambling around, lost. My eyes are so dry and burns as the winds have blew away all my tears. I’ve a lump in my throat and my heart is … Continue reading

Posted in alienation, blinded, dreamers, heartache, life and love, memories, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, reality, with or without you | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

100 years after him

100 years after him I will be no longer! Nor the memory of what never became. 100 years and he will not be either. His dreams for sale; my words remains like lost birds, scattered in the sky. It’s over. … Continue reading

Posted in courage, create life, heartache, leaving, life and love, loss, lost, love story, memories, morality, past, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, surviving, walk of life, words, writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The weed in my garden of love (thistle love)

I met a guy and I loved him but he never knew my love because he only knew the love he claimed he had for me. It was all about his feelings and never about mine. He never knew how … Continue reading

Posted in armed loneliness, courage, create life, desirers, dreamers, fragile, hate, heartache, heartbreaker, hjärtekrossare, leaving, life and love, loneliness, loss, lost, lost trust, love story, morality, poems by vonnely, prose poem, relationships, romance, sadness, Short prose, surviving, vulnerability | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Försvinnande kvinna / Vanishing woman

Vanishing woman Part 1 That late night was now approaching, then when I intended to vanish from you without a trace and wipe you out of my life forever. But late came late all my feet colder. The next morning … Continue reading

Posted in changes, dreaming, heartache, leaving, life and love, loss, lost, love poem, obstacles, old age, poem in English and Swedish, poems by vonnely, Poetry, rebellious lovers, short story, talking, with or without you | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

I was never tougher than the rest

Well, it’s Saturday noon and you’re gone into the blue. I kept an eye on you a while, maybe you did it on me too. It’s true I ran off first because you caused us so much stress. Once you … Continue reading

Posted in borders, fears, loss, lost, love poem, missing, obstacles, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

I never knew him

  I never knew him in the flesh I withdrew for safety reasons He expected too much of me He made me his guiding light Now he rests behind my eyes I have to live with this a while Shame … Continue reading

Posted in armed loneliness, Attraction, authenticity, borders, changes, courage, create life, dreamers, grief, leaving, morality, obstacles, online friends, online romance, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, surviving | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The pains where my soul is seated

        If my soul has a place in my mortal body, then it hides behind the lower tip of the right shoulder blade. You were always on my back and pushed me with your intensity and tough … Continue reading

Posted in back pains, body image, fatigue, life and love, love story, missing, old age, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, relationships, soul seated | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Greta and the environmental concerns (Greta och miljön)

It annoys me this false devoted heightening of this girl in media here in Sweden and abroad. She did not start her school strike for the environment to be praised by media and or by celebrities, minor politicians or a … Continue reading

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Heart wrapped in barbed wire

          I read your letter, roses sweet with thorns thoroughly hidden in thin silk paper. I grieve your heart wrapped in barbed wire! What you have you don’t want and what you want is far away. … Continue reading

Posted in alienation, armed loneliness, create life, desirers, dreamers, friendship, heartache, living in the world, loneliness, loners, longing, love poem, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, reading life, rebellious lovers, repression and borders, unhappiness, vänskap, words, writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

At my age!

I came old and stood at the edge, mirrored nothingness fearing but fighting, as faced the end of the mortal “me” Then I met him, a freedom fighter for his own good only He caught me and brought me a … Continue reading

Posted in aging, become old, courage, old age, poem in English and Swedish, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, reading life | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Ambiguous love (feeling trapped)

He asked me if I had written something at my blog that same day and I said no. “No poems?” he asked and “No!” I said. “Why?”  he queried. “I have nothing to write about” I said unhappy. “So what … Continue reading

Posted in about writing, Attraction, borders, create life, desirers, dreamers, faith, life and love, love story, obstacles, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, romance, walls, with or without you, words, writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Where the birches rustles their summer song

When one goes, the other is seen left behind: But the former will be what comes. The other: the laughing gentleman, now ridiculous naked butt as the fairy tale emperor: but still haughty he gabbles his garbage. Far after the … Continue reading

Posted in about writing, courage, create life, culture values, dreamers, faith, garbage, life and love, loners, lost trust, love story, morality, nature, past, poems by vonnely, Poetry, politics, reading, reading newspapers, repression and borders, sexuality, summer poem, summertime, surviving, Swedish souls, writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Hedgehog men

          He sent me a photo and he had a chin like a hedgehog. He said “You can kiss me as much as you want!” “Oh thanks,” I said in fear. “Yet I don’t!”     … Continue reading

Posted in about writing, aging, Attraction, authenticity, changes, create life, culture values, inspiring movies, inspiring music, life and love, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, prose poem, reading life, rebellious lovers, relationships, sexuality | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

A bird in hand (Spring rain, pollen season)

        When walking home from the grocery in spring rain this last Friday afternoon, I saw all the pollen floating on the streets down the drains and sudden from nowhere I came to think of the Swedish … Continue reading

Posted in create life, life and love, love story, online romance, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, prose poem | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

At 70!

Vid 70 har man samlat på sig berg av illusioner, förlorade, återvunna, återfunna. Livet går vidare, javisst! Men själv har man nått sin vägs ände och går inte längre med. Och sedan då alla dessa berg som skymmer den fria … Continue reading

Posted in aging, create life, loss, old age, poem in Swedish and English, poem in Swedish translated to English, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, reading life | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

An angry man

              An angry man stands at the corner waiting for me; his arms crossed over his chest. “I’m ashamed of you” was the last he said to me. But his English is not good … Continue reading

Posted in changes, courage, lost, lost trust, love poem, love story, morality, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, reality, rebellious lovers, relationships, repression and borders, romance | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Play it again, Sam!

  I said: Sam, see you in Casablanca! And he shrank to a boy’s voice in a phone with a lousy connection and vanished in the night. Now it’s late and I’m running out of time, but still I’ve that … Continue reading

Posted in Africa, alienation, apart, become old, borders, create life, desirers, dreaming, faith, heartache, inspiring movies, life and love, loneliness, lost, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, politics, repression and borders, romance, sentimentality, unhappiness | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

(Mind matter) Märka ord

Märk nu mina ord, jag besökte er ett tag, men var verkligen aldrig där: ett vingslag mot din kind i natten, du rös till litegrann. Vi bor i Sverige men lever i världen. Våra tankar borde vara såsom svalor i … Continue reading

Posted in about writing, alienation, create life, cultures, dreamers, free, frihet, left aside, living in the world, love poem, morality, paradigms, poem in Swedish and English, poem in Swedish translated to English, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, politics, reality, relationships, repression and borders, svalor, Sweden view, Swedish poem to English, vår | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

And Sam said

  And Sam said “Lady, you shot me” and he fell back and hasty he bled to death, still in his 30s. Soon 70, I walk my way slow and oldish as life and people have hurt me hard but … Continue reading

Posted in aging, alienation, become old, changes, courage, create life, desirers, fooled, grief, life and love, living with chronic diseases, Living with chronic pains, loss, lost trust, love story, memories, missing, morality, old age, past, Poetry, secret love, sexuality, spring, surviving | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Adonis’ speech

  I gave her my heart and she sliced it and spiced it and fried it and show it to the world to view and to consume. Since I’ve fled the battles she gives me bad names but my name … Continue reading

Posted in about writing, life and love, lost trust, morality, poem, poems by vonnely, Poetry, reading life, reality, relationships, romance, with or without you | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The bitter taste of a depressed man

        He said, why would I make friends when people are just fake, I’m lost in a fake world, I’m 34 and my life is over. I said I just got a headache! I woke up too … Continue reading

Posted in alienation, armed loneliness, create life, friendship, loneliness, loners, online friends, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, sadness | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Once upon a time I had a crush on a young man

Once upon a time I had a crush on a young man. He had such a lovely mustache, dimples in his cheeks and very blue eyes. He looked at me and got my heart to beat faster. But he was … Continue reading

Posted in alienation, create life, desirers, dreamers, heartache, loneliness, loss, love story, memories, obstacles, prose poem, reading life, sentimentality, sexuality, short story, unhappiness | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Simple

          We’re simple people you and I and our feelings for each other are also simple. But the world isn’t simple. I wanted to release you to free myself, but you didn’t want to. So we … Continue reading

Posted in apart, Attraction, faith, living in the world, love story, obstacles, online romance, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, relationships, unhappiness | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The elevator (invisibilized)

                  The lady in the elevator looks down on you, but what do you care! You’re going up and she’s going down, you’ve nothing to share! Mistreated all your life, people now … Continue reading

Posted in alienation, armed loneliness, create life, darkness, fragile, loners, lost, lost trust, obstacles, past, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, reality, repression and borders, sadness, unhappiness | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

“I’m fine, thanks!”

I looked after you and found you in my heart, that which I lost given it to you. You hold yourself back with these “I’m fine”. With time, it’s like serving a chicken to a lion. We are like prisoners … Continue reading

Posted in Attraction, desirers, dreaming, heartache, life and love, love story, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, relationships, romance, with or without you | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Sunday morning coffee insnowed in Sweden

The weather reports promised large snowing at the East coast regions and it came and comes! I’m having my Sunday morning coffee insnowed in Sweden while the plow cars roar outside my windows and I read online a CNN article … Continue reading

Posted in courage, create life, cultures, poems by vonnely, Poetry, politics, reading, reality, repression and borders, Sweden view, web papers | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Part-time commitments (perspectives)

  In an urbanized and modern society as ours, even “love” has a “best before” date. He always said to her “I could do everything for you,” and he told her his love was “forever”. But in practice his love … Continue reading

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Unhappy, although I’m loved (forget me not)

        I’m unhappy, although I’m loved. And I tell myself every day to be content with what I have, but that doesn’t make me feel better. Unsatisfactions eats my soul like mice making hole in a pantry … Continue reading

Posted in become old, blues, create life, longing, loss, online friends, poems by vonnely, Poetry, reading life, reality, repression and borders | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

If I’ve lost you, I’ve lost you!

You have been a fortnight offline. And if I’ve lost you, I’ve lost you. I don’t cry but I don’t smile either. It snows when I lower the blinds in the afternoon. It snows when I raise them in morning. … Continue reading

Posted in armed loneliness, heartache, life and love, loss, love poem, online friends, online romance, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, Winter heart | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Life and love

  It’s easy understanding love get difficulties to survive in daily life for those poor who hardly have money for the day and are forced to live in a pitiful hut there rain comes freely through an airy roof, no … Continue reading

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Impossible love

  When I think of him (all the time!)… there’s not so much about having distinct thoughts as about a constant inner awareness, perceiving his existence. He is a living presence in my soul. Living streaming water… But when this … Continue reading

Posted in borders, create life, dreamers, happiness, hope, love poem, poems, poems by vonnely, prose poem, rebellious lovers, repression and borders | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Moving, still steady

I’ve lived in this house for ten years but for the last years I’ve mostly been online, it all while I tried to shake off my feelings of wearing a cooling suit of loneliness and desolation. Solitude has for long … Continue reading

Posted in borders, create life, hope, loneliness, loners, love poem, maturity, memories, nature, online friends, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, reality, relationships, repression and borders, sadness, Swedish "culture", Swedish souls, walk of life, writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment