I woke up from my late afternoon nap.
And then I missed him. Or to be frank –
I missed to have the warm tenderness
between two people being together and
liking each other. But he’s never here –
and frankly he never understand a word
I say. And to be even more frank about
love and such, he’s the only one offering
it to me. And it’s chilly here in my flat.
A moment later and still in the same mood
now with a blanket around my shoulders
I stand in my kitchen pouring hot water in
a Melitta with coffee powder. Sudden I can
hear a well-known Dylan song in my head.
It’s”It ain’t me babe”. And while I listen to
the tune in me and make my coffee, I think –
this is frankly the truth about him and me.
I’m not the one he’s looking for and he’s not
the one I need in my life. But we’ve the same
longing for love and the same desire to find
anyone to paste that stamp of love on.
I guess I hold on to him because he’s frankly
better than nothing. But I should certainly
tell him how I feel about him and me. Yet –
it’s hard to talk with him as he’s frankly the
dumbest person I ever met in my whole life.
But, he is kind and he say he loves me more
than anything and I like him a bit. Frankly –
I fear truth would make me lose having him
in my life. So – I don’t know what to do with
him and with us? He just want peace, he say.
Well, I put all those thoughts away – as getting
nowhere with them and I drink my coffee calmly
while I watch the News on TV, all conflicts as far
as he is. If I’m lucky we’ll have a talk on phone
later and then I’ll sleep again. It’s not much, but
it’s something! And tomorrow is another day?