When walking alone hand in hand with a friend in mind

Depressed in Fog






When walking alone but hand in hand with
a friend in my mind countryside around my
home looks its best whether it’s winter or
summer. But I’m always sad.

My days gets easier to conquer when a friend’s
kind thoughts reaches my heart. But there are
days when I resist life and my heart is closed to
any as all that hurts too much and loneliness
choking me. Then sadness is my only follower.

True and real are not siblings. Friends, you gets
them “out there”, but they thrives inside you,
until your beliefs crashing against hard ground.
And you’re only sad. Sadness disguised.

I smile not to worry as I am in constant worry.
Every lovely beginning has an ending in rags
and loss and grief – forgive me, but my heart
can’t take it more. I hide in tears and sadness.

Faith, is a stranger – life shrinks to stinging
salt without sweetness. I keep on struggling
life on my own, limping my walks as there
are no other options. But I’m always sad.

I constantly guard my every step not to fall.
I can’t believe in future, more than as a tale
told by my utopian imaginary friends. I feel
I struggle like a blindfolded. And I’m sad.

Maybe one day I’ll be able to see I’ve done
some good deeds in the shadows I call my
life and had some good impacts on others
and perhaps love was if I had let it happen.
But what actually is, I am sad blind in tears.
Forgive me for everything I am not able to!

photo by yasb feb 3 2014

photo by yasb feb 3 2014

This entry was posted in living in the world, living with chronic diseases, poems, poems by vonnely, walk of life, with or without you and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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