I miss the love that was not

pic from the TV serial "Doctor Foster"

pic from the TV serial “Doctor Foster”

I like to spend some of my time watching music videos on Youtube. Some songs I listen to over and over. John Waite “Missing you” is one of them. I’m choosey when it comes to illustrations and pics. But last evening I find a video with amazing illustrations. I simply felt I had to write something inspired by this video.
Latest weeks I have been occupy every Monday by an English TV serial shown on Swedish TV called “Doctor Foster”. It’s about a woman being married for 14 years between the ages 23 to 37. Sudden she discovers her husband has been cheating on her for years and even stolen all her savings, leaving nothing to her and their son. I was so obtained by this serial I even watch all replays of the episodes. The pic above is from this TV serial.

 

 

 

I miss not you, but I miss the love that was not
I miss not you, but the one you said you were
I miss not you, but the love I richly deserves

If only one single note in the song you sang
to me were true, I still love this note. Even if
it was pure calculating, this lovely note made
me love you. You came so close to me. I came
close to myself trough you.

You created a persona so nice – and in a
corner of your soiled soul you knew what
characterizes a good man for a woman –
and I fell in love with your image.

I can tell people I don’t miss you, but it’s
not true – everywhere I go I’m looking for
“you”, in spite I know he not exist at all.

But you showed me how deep my desire to
live with someone is – and I’m not thinking
now about those poetry romances I spend
my time to create so artfully.

In a way we are the same kind, as creating
fantasies people believe in – but mine are
free poetry, giving something to others, but
you rob people on their trust and make life
smaller and harder to cope with.

I miss not you, but I miss the love that was not
I miss not you, but the one you said you were
I miss not you, but the love I richly deserves.

Now deep inside me a little hard bullet of steel
pierces my heart. It’s you; it’s the grief coming
requiring its right.

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This entry was posted in create life, inspiring music, living in the world, love story, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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