Vanity dreams getting you

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

To have someone special in your mind is not the same
as to have that person in your life. No, it’s not! Time is
passing and I fear you and I, we are drifting apart. Was
it all just vanity wishes and could we have done better?
But perhaps no harm done? As dreams may make life
a little easier to live? But if the dreams shows up to be
just delusions in one single mind? It would be too sad
and hard and for me as for anyone else, denial would
come before truth. But wherever you go, I’m with you
in my mind, walking in your direction on my sore feet
and I’m singing my vanity dreams, pure or out of tune.

 

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A real life that’s not poetry

 

 

 

Now last he told he’ll be out of work once again
and it annoyed me a lot, as it’s like he lives from
one day to another, having no plan that includes
me in a future, but having a mind full of narrow
disagreements. But once he said “I wonder if it
will be like this forever, if we ever will be able to
meet and if we ever get a chans to be together.
And I said “your love will anyhow come famous
from the many poems written by me, so far real
as we can be”. But he said, “I don’t care if to be
literature or any about your writing. I just want
to be a real person in a life that’s real with you”.

 

 

 

The water tower nearby the house where I nowadays live, enlightened a previous year before my time at Valentine’s day. Image copied from the website tindradesign.nu

 

 

 

 

Posted in create life, desirers, dreamers, love story, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, reading life, reality, writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Igloo wish, December knocking

 

I do wish you the best: a better job,
safe with good salary and a future,
a home that’s warm, loving woman
a couple of kids and a good health.
But if you still will say you just want
me, I will give you all what you want.
If so leave my cozy liberated igloo to
live in a poor tent in desert with you.

 

 

 

 

 

Posted in create life, cultures, life and love, love poem, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, rebellious lovers | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Cold November (Snow bunting song)

(On November 24)  November Snow

November is now snowing outside my windows,
but where are you in the night so dark and cold?
I live near the Arctic Circle, feeling lonely and old:
when will you come to my Nordic latitude and to
my lone bed to heat my feet and swing my soul?
Tell a snow bunting who misses her summer love!

 

(On November 27)  Minus, bright Sun

minus and cold
no gloom but bright
sun on short visit at noon
woolen socks, tea in a mug
and an easy chair waiting for you

 

 

 

 

 
I have never seen a snow buting and didn’t know about this species before reading on the web about it. But the nature in the video below looks just the same as there I live in Sweden. But it’s from Ontario, Canada, recorded on a train travel. Beautiful scenery! 🙂

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Evening call in morning light

I miss so much, you to be present
with me. Your smile when you gets
your eyes on me on the screen is just
stunning, your gentle voice makes me
smile and so do your tender touch, if so
only imagined and in my dreams. I’m so
happy we found each other: this is a true
miracle: mutual love – if so on a distance!

Yet, morning comes with hard bright light.
I’m not young and lovely anymore, but old
and idle and walking with a cane while you
still have your young needs, and what may
be for you nothing more than a body for it,
you think you do not have to tell me as it
would only upset me. But, we can all find
online the silver lining that makes our grey
daily life bearable. What was real, we may
never get to know. And happiness is a
choice. Well, that’s what I’m told.

 

 

Posted in create life, desirers, happiness, life and love, loneliness, love story, online romance, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, reality | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Grayest November in Sweden

 

Hidden hate in my heart in Stockholm Sweden in greyest November with
daylight less than 8 hours, keep the flame. That’s when an official explains
to me how an expandable and adjustable shower curtain rod works. “Buy
on IKEA” I’m advised. And I simply hate Sweden and the Swedes! So much!

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Life and love

 

It’s easy understanding love get difficulties to
survive in daily life for those poor who hardly
have money for the day and are forced to live
in a pitiful hut there rain comes freely through
an airy roof, no protection against heat or cold
or bad and bullied by a cold world without any
compassion for the small and vulnerable. Love
and tenderness comes into trouble, yes!

But if you have your basic needs if so barely but
still can chose to eat food you like, have decent
clothes, a heated house and a door of your own
to lock out what’s unwanted – and yet not have
someone who loves you and makes your heart
beat harder? How is life then for you?

You wish you could be contented with what you
have, as those “know-how” people advice you to,
but your heart is sad and gives you no peace and
you begin to feel unhappy every woken moment,
tempted thinking you could easily leave your safe
life only to get love in life – if so forced to live in a
hut! It would be alright with “the rest”.

Most don’t believe in that and don’t live like that,
but strive for money and status and fame and good
pensions and they look down at those who do not,
thinking they are romantic and weak fools, having
no goals for life. But nothing can matters more than
getting to sleep close to a loved one’s warm body.

I’m haunted by the unhappiness in my soul that asks
me all the time: What is the point of waking up alone
every morning and face life without you? Nada!

 

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Moving into gloomy November

 

Two weeks not a word from you is a very long time,
two weeks at a new place is too short to feel home.
I’m tired and worn out after all hassle with the move
and I wonders about you, maybe you’re on another
road and direction while I’m stuck here in dead end
resting in an easy chair at a window with a new but
narrow view. It’s a back street with a row of houses
having windows blindly staring back at me in a dark
gloomy damp November fog that embrace the street
and the people passing by. Trees now lose their last
golden leaves in rainy missing tears and indoors in
a new silence, I’m sailing in my mind into the dense
and greyish white mute fog wall out there, telling me
nothing about how it gets or about you. Oh, I’m just
fine, I can’t complain, have what I need. But I miss
you though. I wake early before dawn feeling lonely
as ever and gets sad over my constant everlasting
loneliness. True, you can move to a new apartment,
but never move from yourself. But a Sunday during
my afternoon nap the phone wakes me and it’s you
asking why I been absent lately not given one word
to you. Oh smile! You’re my gleam of light in gloom!
You’re the bird I don’t have in my hand but sings in
a bush only for me. Your’e my lonely longing and I’m
your desire. Come gloomy November or lovely May!

 

 

 

 

photo private by vonnely November 11, 2013

Posted in changes, courage, create life, darkness, desirers, dreamers, grief, happiness, longing, love poem, love story, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, relationships, sadness, surviving | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The need to create holiness (Save Our Souls!)

If there is no Paradise, then it’s truly urgent we invent
such a space having power to provide forgiveness for
all the evil deeds we are forced to witness in our time
and to an extent we can hardly cope with it anymore:
our confused hearts in despair and our eyes feels like
burned in fire! And if there is no God, then we have to
create that living holiness in our hearts, this to survive
and remain as sentient and loving individuals. It’s you
and I and we all! What we gave, money cannot tell.

Posted in create life, dreamers, faith, living in the world, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, politics, sacred | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Voices speaking to the melancholy Swedish soul

It’s the underlying lost melancholy white tune in
Springsteen and Harris voices beyond any lyrics,
music sets and genres. It sneaks out on you, forces
itself on you, it’s you far from forged reality grilles.
And it tells of the sad gloom in my Swedish soul.
With roots in times long gone, still that sad poor
country maid with no future walk to and fro her
milking and kitchen duties, while she secretly is
dreaming of a lost love that’s never been. Bound
to class poverty, misused by some master behind
a matron’s back, poor girl join the single mothers’
army in shame far from the church blessing and
favors. She shows up a hundred years later still
in dreams and with her eyes stinging in front of
her laptop screen’s seductive and pale light. She
gets nausea of the smell of poverty cabbage soup
just like the daughter of Indra in the Strindberg
drama. But dresses in blue for a Saturday dance
and a love to come and life to finally begin before
it ends up. Because if we have nothing at all, we
must at least have dreams something can come to
be, that life is possible and has a meaning of any
kind. And behind the reality grilles melancholic
voices sings, covert tunes of white pain in the wells
of our souls, those rare tunes carried out by bards
that becomes blessed and raised by those drunken
and screaming crowds. And it never comes real. We
stretches towards the other, but all we ever share is
the loneliness in our lost sad souls. And we are all
the lonely cowboy riding headed for her sundown.

Till vänster: Troligen är detta lillpigan Signe Desideria Säfström (1884 i Vaksala) och arbetsgivaren Lundins dotter Hedvig Helena på Johannesberg i Funbo. Signe Desideria Säfström flyttade därifrån den 24 oktober 1900. Foto: Johan Lundin. Bild från Upplandsmuseet. Public Domain.
Till höger: Två pigor utan namn hos patron Wallmark på Hällevadsholms gård den 2 juli 1923. Foto: Oscar Färdig. Bild från Bohusläns Museum. Public Domain.

 

Posted in create life, cultures, darkness, hope, inspiring music, inspiring songs, loneliness, loners, longing, memories, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, reading life, reality, rebellious lovers, repression and borders, romance, roots, Swedish "culture", Swedish souls | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

And if!

photo by vonelly, the path to the ponds nearby my home, October 17, 2016

 
And if one day my hands cannot reach for you
and you will be gone or never came my way, my
heart will still reach out for you. And if one day
my eyes cannot catch you anymore, the image
of your dear face will still linger in my memory.
And if one day your ears will not hear me call
for you, the stars above us will still sing songs
about a love and trust you made me believe in.

 

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Dead Queen, City of Stockholm

Members of the Swedish Academy in December 2017

 

Do not breathe the air in my capital, Stockholm city, be-
cause it is poisoned by the stifling stench of inbreeding!
Close eyes and ears to the city’s leading priestesses, all
blindly anchored in their middleclass crotches while they
vicious chanting songs denying your juicy ripe tempting
power of love. Avoid those rapists’ phallus courts never
giving you justice. We live in dangerous times: if ever a
Garden of Eden, it’ll be somewhere else. You’ll never find
your Tyche in the headlights at the Mount Parnassus, it’s
simply eerie fame. See, free to be is an African girl who
can walk to school with her book and secret cup of blood,
she smiles and sings with no fear: eyes open living hope.

 

Posted in Africa, Attraction, create life, cultures, dreamers, hope, opportunities, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, politics, reading life, repression and borders, sexuality, Swedish "culture", Swedish conditions | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

“On behalf of our nation…”

 

Trump at Ceremonial Swearing In at Ovale room White House. October 8, 2018

Following quoted from realclearpolitics.com October 8, 2018

“Members of Congress, members of the Cabinet, honored guests, and fellow Americans: It is my privilege to address you tonight from the East Room of the White House.

We are gathered together this evening for a truly momentous occasion. I have long been told that the most important decision a President can make is the appointment of a Supreme Court Justice. Well, in just a few moments, we will proudly swear in the newest member of the United States Supreme Court: Justice Brett Kavanaugh. …”

“…Very special and treasured guests tonight are Justice K about the “real” reasons why she resigns. I have certainly no idea, but I’m pretty sureTrump didn’t knew 6 months ago that she would leave her post and that he was as surprised as everyone else. Because, if he had known about it for so long, he would by now have had someone to replace her and would present that person at the same occation as now.’s amazing wife, Ashley. Thank you, Ashley. (Applause.) And their two beautiful daughters, Margaret and Liza. Thank you. (Applause.) And we are also joined by Justice Kavanaugh’s mom and dad, Martha and Ed. Thank you. (Applause.)

I would like to begin tonight’s proceeding differently than perhaps any other event of such magnitude. On behalf of our nation, I want to apologize to Brett and the entire Kavanaugh family for the terrible pain and suffering you have been forced to endure. …”

“… Those who step forward to serve our country deserve a fair and dignified evaluation, not a campaign of political and personal destruction based on lies and deception. What happened to the Kavanaugh family violates every notion of fairness, decency, and due process.

Our country, a man or woman must always be presumed innocent unless and until proven guilty. (Applause.) And with that, I must state that you, sir, under historic scrutiny, were proven innocent. Thank you. (Applause.) You were. Thank you very much. (Inaudible.)

Margaret and Liza, your father is a great man. He is a man of decency, character, kindness, and courage who has devoted his life to serving his fellow citizens. And now, from the bench of our nation’s highest court, your father will defend the eternal rights and freedoms of all Americans. You know that. (Applause.) …”

October 9, 2018
Quote from edition.ccn.com

“Washington (CNN)President Donald Trump announced on Tuesday that US Ambassador to the United Nations Nikki Haley has resigned and will leave her post by the end of the year.

Sitting side-by-side in the Oval Office, Trump praised Haley as a “fantastic person” who has “done an incredible job” and said he would gladly welcome her back into his administration down the line.
“She’s done a fantastic job and we’ve done a fantastic job together. We’ve solved a lot of problems and we’re in the process of solving a lot of problems,” Trump said.
“She told me probably six months ago, ‘You know maybe at end of the year — at the end of the two year period — but by the end of the year I want to take a little time off, I want to take a break,'” he added. …”

There are speculations about the “real” reasons why she resigns. I have certainly no idea (but a thought!). I pretty sure Trump didn’t knew 6 months ago that she would leave her post and that he was as surprised as everyone else. Because, if he had known about it for so long, then he would already have chosen someone to replace her, and he would have presented that person at the same time as Kelly announced her resignation.

About the big drama at the Hearings before the election of  Kavanaugh as a judge, I’m just a confused person coming far away from – wide-eyed happy we have not such odd performances in Sweden…!

art performance by Mattias Norström, Stockholm

Well, the scandals around The Swedish Academy may be of the same caliber? 😦 (Maybe The Swedish Acadamy will with time regain its reputation abroad far  from Scandinavia, but hardly locally in Sweden for “the (wo-)man on the street”. But it wouldn’t surprise me if with US’s Supremes Court, this scandal will roll off it like water on a goose, don’t you think?)

 

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Impossible love

 

When I think of him (all the time!)… there’s not so much about having distinct thoughts as about a constant inner awareness, perceiving his existence. He is a living presence in my soul. Living streaming water…

But when this underlying constant awareness of him occasionally reaches my conscious thinking during the day, I begin to think explicit shaped thoughts of him. At first just some sweet and smiling thoughts about him…

…but then comes the great, grown and rational and mouthful self, walking with big feet and taking over my mind having a whole Santa bag full with sensible doubts neat and tidy packed. And this giant delivers me sensible gifted thoughts about obstacles getting what I want to have in my life (him), thoughts that crumbles hopes to be at all able to strive for what I desire. But Santa points out for me I should become sensible and put my energy on what is realistic.

Because my lover I’m told, he’s a totally impossible love object in my part of the world, he just doesn’t fit in! “Birds of a feather stick together.” So if we would like to live together: well, it would just be impossible to make it work! When got to know his opinions and morals and deeds: simply impossible to put up with! And the quarrels we have had because of our differences (those he prefer to call “misunderstandings”): impossible to keep on with, it’s simply unhealthy! Thus, the gaps in age/culture/religions: it all together totally impossible, end of story! And a last stone to overturn the wagon of hope and faith and dreams: what would people think – if they knew! It would turn out to be an impossible everyday life for us both!

So after all these big thoughts from my superego I tell myself, “you see now: it’s impossible and you are crazy if you believe something else, so do yourself a favor and forget about him!” And I hoist that proud flag for a week. (More likely it’s not more than about five day at most I can stand this…).

Because after a few days I becomes so depressed and unhappy, feeling alone as in a ditch of darkness and mud: that’s life “without him!” So I’m calling. And he is always there! It seems impossible that he can be, but he actually is. It’s because he loves me, he has told me. He will love me forever, he has told me.

Every smug person are welcome to think I’m naive. But after a couple of years giving attention to “sensible” and depressing thoughts, I just have to give up such gloomy ruminating: I can’t cope with that kind of “common sense”! That’s what’s impossible to live with!

Now I try to relax and  learn to swim in my warm and romantic feelings for him: as he actually is there in my life – and I try to learn to avoid those troubled thoughts about how impossible this love is and just try to teach myself to allow it to be – whatever outcome. Common sense can’t feed my soul and heart, but he can – and if common sense were all we could get in life, then we would all be like living dead.

 

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Young longing


Jag har en åldrad kvinnas hud
och en krigares ärrade hjärta
men min unga längtan är bara
du; dina händers hängivenhet

I have the skin of an aging woman
and the scarred heart of a warrior
but my young longing is only you;
the devotion in your hands

 

Summer dreams, Aldo Luongo

Posted in become old, dreamers, longing, love poem, missing, poem in Swedish and English, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, romance | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Chinese drama, Internet use and Swedish matters of the heart

Skogskyrkogården, Forest churchyard outside Stocholm City

According to Swedish newspapers reports in September were public institutions in Sweden such as Sweden’s television and the Ministry of Foreign Affairs exposed to massive attacks by Chinese internet trolls. The affected have confirmed that “an increased activity has been noted” on such forums as Facebook, email and Twitter but did not tell more about the extent and effect of those hostile attacks or how they handle the situation.

What triggered this situation is the story about three Chinese tourists who arrived at their hostel (hotel or hostel) in Stockholm in early September one day before they had booked rooms, but still wanted access to the rooms. When the hostel staff relentlessly rejected this demand it all end up in a big drama – finally a police patrol had to remove the tourists, first from the hotel and then from the street outside the hotel. The police patrol dumped the violent tourists outside the city on a road next a churchyard, Stockholm’s Skogskyrkogård (Stockholm Forest Churchyard).

This is actually what Swedish police units usually do with disturbing people at public places: take them in the police car and dry todrop them off at the countryside. This method can be discussed: if it is appropriate to dump troubled people outside town without checking if they have opportunities to get home or are suitably dressed for the season in a Nordic zone. But it can hardly be described as “police brutality”. Rather like a show of Chinese “drama queens”!

It has been speculations about this incident and furthermore about the following massive and aggressive reactions from China, state and embassy and Chinese media. One theory is it was a kind of “culture conflict” as this kind of dramatic behaviour would be very strange and awkward for Swedish people. But I think few in Sweden beleives in that. Another theory and more credible,  is that has a background in that the Swedish Ministry of Foreign Affairs has requested book publisher Gui Minhai to be freed from the Chinese jail.

In short he is a Swedish citizen of Chinese ethnicity, who from his home in Thailand has published books critical to the Chinese dictatorship. He was kidnapped and imprisoned in 2015, released in 2017 and then kidnapped again in 2018.  His health is so weak he is at risk of to dye, as denied medical treatment and visitors, isolated and handed over to the Chinese dragon’s reckless jaws.

Whatever authenticity of the tourists’ story in a dilemma, the local media reports in China have make impressions among its own public and upset common Chinese people telling they never ever want to visit Sweden as tourists. Well… who wants them?!

The  Chinese reactions to the hotel incident is one example how Chinese agencies and authorities act aggressively in Europe: by spying on Chinese people living abroad, by internet trolling, by trade, by buying military interesting ports and having ownership in multinational corporations stated in Sweden and abroad (like AB VOLVO) and by official offensive political pressures and threats.

VOLVO – for those who don’t know – is a Swedish multinational manufacturing company and its core activity is the production, distribution and sale of trucks, buses and construction equipment, Volvo also supplies marine and industrial drive systems and financial services. In 2016, it was the world’s second largest manufacturer of heavy-duty trucks. (Wikipedia)

AB VOLVO is based in 18 countries and has 100 000 employees. A private Chinese company (Geely) is the major shareholder. The Volvo Group  trains its employees all over the world in “the right behavior” (Code of Conduct)  – and in promoting “human rights” through a computer game.

I don’t know anything about computer game uses as I’ve never come near a computer game even less used one. To me as belonging to an older generation grown up with celluloid dolls and wooden toy trains and Enid Blyton’s children books, this “Code of Conduct”  sounds like some kind of brainwashing. This even more as I consider moral and ethics to be something that’s incorporated into one’s personality and therefore much more basic than to learn to perform what the group you belong to and have around consider to be appropriate behavior. Even a sociopath or an autistic person can learn to performe proper acts in front of a groups eyes.

But a big company must have tools to act against misconduct. And it is really good those bad apples that must be among 100 thousand co-workers knows what applies.

And the Chinese on whatever level are probably okay with it even if it includes such mysterious luxury as “human rights” (whatever that can be, they might think?), but they are familiar with training people to right thinking and are even more pleased with “retrain” Muslims in their re-education camps.* And the big man himself is a product of retraining as spending years of his youth in Chinese retraining camps, not to forget.

(Last on news (5 – 6 October) about the Chinese repressive actions is the report the President of Interpol Meng Hongwei disappeared without a trace during a trip to China. His family hasn’t of him since September 25.)

När man talar om trollen så står de i farstun (it’s an old Swedish saying = “speak of the trolls and you have them standing in the hall”, it’s a warning not to talk about evil things, but it is also told from ancient times: trolls, they crack and die of the

daylight.)

“Let there be light” then!

The invention of Internet opened the world for people everywhere and became a door opener and a meeting point. But now Internet is partly captured by dubious and dark interests. Therefore has the internet become a possible danger for the indiviual user such as you and I, as being an arena for extremist political propaganda, pornography traps, spamming and scamming and it’s done by using sneak paths, skillfully fooling our minds.

The questions to ask are like: Can an individual and free thinking be possible to create in today’s world? Is the  fundamental need in the human to trust others possible to hold?  How do you avoid to become cynical but to keep your heart’s welfare, its joy and lovingcapacity? “All you need is love” easy said!

Both Russia and China wage a massive cultural war against individuals and governments in Europe (and the US) with their known troll factories. And from my local and maybe limited level I see them as more dangerous for the Swedish democracy than the national nationalist party “Swedish Democrats” (commonly named “SD”). This party who received 17.5% of the votes in the last election in September this year – which worries many who dislike their harsh immigrant rhetoric. (Which is an overwhelming majority of the Swedish people, that’s good to remember!)

A digression from the main subject

 

I know of course that we have more dangers for our democratic values in front of us than from China and Russia, like the white power movement lead by that T-rex fellow Steve Bannon and his friends, having the goal to destroy EU and the liberal democracies in Europe. But not even the nationalistic and conservative Swedish party “SD” want to join them, as they so obvious carry the signs of the plague. We have also the danger from the Turkish President Erdogan, intruding in European countries.

About 100 000 Turks lives in Sweden – in fear for Erdogan’s secret agents. Likewise we have the same danger coming from Iran, who spy and threat people with roots in Iran but now lives in Europe. But this criminal and nasty activities are less depended on internet control but are more of physical nature, concrete and life threating, coming from neighbors and members and leaders at Mosques. (True believers must nowadays find Allah in their homes as the sons of the devil ockupies the houses of holiness.)

Four Russian hackers were the other day deported from Netherlands and charged in US. It’s the same kind of ruthless crooks like those who so cruel and scary poisoned people within the British borders! “Because we can”?

Those kind of monsters are certainly more dangerous and scary than young Chinese students getting pocket money to work as internet trolls. Even if they are as many and diligent as ants in an anthill.

Hugo vad der Goes (ca 1440 – 1498) The fall of Adam and Eve

 

I’m happy to live in Sweden. It’s not a Paradise on earth, but Sweden is a developed democracy with a rule of law. All people, regardless of what they are, have the same rights and they are legally protected from discrimination.

But for about 10 – 12 % of the Swedish citizens  are those legal rights more a paper statement than living proof as they have their roots abroad. Still the fact is, those foreigners who come to Sweden and threaten people steady living here, they commit a crime on Swedish ground. It means Erdogan is a criminal and if I were Angela Merkel I would not shake his hand without spit in my own first.

To return from this digression, back to the Internet perspective:

What worries me for my Swedish society is that we Swedes and especially the Swedish authorities are such ingénues, especially regarding to the use of IT and about caring for the IT security and getting knowledge about it.

Our society is almost completely digitized. And as modern warfare looks, it means our society is terribly vulnerable. It’s said in today society is not about weapon and traditional military equipment. We live in a culture war.

*I use the term “culture war” as Christopher Wylie expalin it, check him on youtube and The Guardian
*Cambridge Analytica whistleblower: ‘We spent $1m harvesting millions of Facebook profiles’.

ÖB, General Micael Bydén

Swedish ÖB (Swedish Chief of Staff of the Army) can dance on Pride and sing “Suspicious Mind” all in order not only to fight prejudices but also take advantage of the opportunity to promote more money and political support for the Army Forces and its needed reconstruction. But we need more Must and not more machine guns and soldiers. I’m of course proud of him for his Pride performance. But we need (more of) a security service that detects all the spies threats from states like Russia, China and Turkey (and others) operating in Sweden.

(“Must” is a shortening for the” Swedish military intelligence and security service”.)

The IT Scandal

An interview with the Prime Minister at the time, Stefan Löfven: Transport Agency data breach is a “train wreck” Swedish broadcast interview24 juli 2017
sverigesradio.se/sida/artikel.aspx?programid=2054&artikel=6743646

We had the IT scandal this year revealing that technicians in the Czech Republic, Romania and without security had for the last years access to almost all of the Sweden’s infrastructures, including names and addresses of people with a protected identity or other sensitive identities, like military security agents.

When the scandal was a fact (at last) and media chased the ministers for responses, the Infrastructure Minister Anna Johansson said to the journalists nothing suggested that any secret information had leaked. Of course not! No one can ever see if it has happened!

The media had difficulties long to make proper researches of this and they experienced it such as officials tried to put the lid on. But then the Constitutional Committee (KU) grounded in the parliament, criticized the government for handling the so-called IT scandal at the Transport Agency, not only for inaccuracies in the management of IT operations but also that the information inside the government was unclear, meaning politicians and their officials couldn’t inform or avoid to inform each who should have known about the delicate situation.

Those people responsible for our country and the safety of the ten millions citizens in this country, was not responsible at all. But this all began during the previous bourgeois government led by the former Prime Minister Fredrik Reinfeldt, who ordered the outsourcing of our IT security formering, this in order to save money. But of course also for political reason, because for a conservative government private enterprise is better and more pleasing than a state ownership, even when it comes to the country’s security issues.

Three ministers were required to resign, but the Prime Minister fired two. The Minister of Home Affairs, Anders Ygeman was kicked aloft: as he became the group leader in the parliament for the Social Democrat group. He became then more visible than the prime minister himself at press conferences. After the election now in September this year, he is even more in power and visible. (He seems to be preparing to become the next party leader.)

So in the Social Democrats Party leaders became rewarded when they have committed failures. Thus it seems the Social Democrats protect their own leaders, not their voters.

The Minister of Infrastructure Anna Johansson was also fired form her post. Only three weeks after the election now in September, she was appointed as chairman of the labor market committee in parliament.

I got a shock reading this last in a newspaper – and that’s the reason for I at all write this blogpost: I’ve voted for this party and even if it was a tactic vote, I now I felt scrupulously deceived. Stupid me! But if I am still alive at the next election, I will not vote the same again, that’s for sure!

Thus… in the Social Democratic Party, claiming to represent the vast mass of wage earners and low-income earners and has done since 1800s, the representing leaders who misconduct are rewarded with other top jobs. Not to mention the former workers’ representatives, who after to their political missions, turn to jobs in business to then retire as millionaires. It stick in one’s craw!

Social Democrats are no longer the people’s party. All they want is to have and maintain political power and to be richly rewarded for it.

The Swedish populist political party, the Swedish Democrates (SD)

It is in this perspective to see the success of the nationalist party in the last election, September 2018. Representatives of the party can say idiotic things about ethnicity to the media, in their own media and at election speches and in the parliament. Their supporters may write horrible and/or stupid things on internet blogs and they have a lot of shady news magazines, and always creating new ones having an internet war for “alternative” truths.

But their success is due to the fact that common people are dissatisfied with the politics that has been conducted the latest decades, especially by the Social Democratic Party, but also the other established parties. People voted for nationalistic and populistic Swedish Democrats (SD), not for liking their agenda but because of the frustration with the politics overall.

One can call SD for a racist, nationalist, Populist Party or whatever given derogatory epithet. It’s all correct! But it won’t change the fact it has become a parliament party through which they disappointed and neglected in the society show their dissatisfaction. It’s a watch up, really!

Unfortunately are the politicians in this party hardly capable or interested in taking care of this dissatisfaction among people, but using it only looking for their own interests.

Our votes are simply wasted as garbage. Should we then follow (Voltaire’s novel character) Candide’s advice, end listening to the silly talks in the public space, such false and quasi-philosophical lectures about what creates happy minds, bullshit frankly – and devote us to the own garden and its needs of care?

How to handle strong frustration, “me” contra “society”?

Voltaire, French writer and philosopher, living 1694 -1778

I have since spring or before, struggled with increasing feelings of gloomy frustration about the social climate today, not at all being comfortable be in present times. Then Voltaire’s novel “Candide” came to my mind.

Candide’s conclusion is that one should ignore populist and falsity lectures and talks about “the world”, but take care of what you have for hand, your garden. And I wondered (as many reader of the novel before and after me) what it could mean in practice (especially for me) and the consequences of this advice: should we all turn our backs to society and leave it to their place fate in the hands of greedy and / or antidemocratic interests? Or what?

It may sound a bit strange and farfetched, but I got a kind of an answer that freed me from the valley of hopelessness and depression when I happened to see a video on Youtube. It shows the rescue of mountain lion kept as a circus animal and chained at the back of a pickup for 20 years. It was freed by a group of Animal Defenders International (ADI).

This unselfish work for saving an animal brought light back to me and drew me out of my low mood. What could give you the same relief – I do not know! But there is always a way and a door to freedom. We are born as moral beings, reaching for others’ wellbeing.

Quote 1 “May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears.” Nelson Mandela

Quote 2 “It is not possible to be in favor of justice for some people and not be in favor of justice for all people.” Martin Luther King Jr.

For sure, to vote in elections for a conservative populist and dissatisfaction party is absolutely not an option. The bigmouthed populists want to close the doors and borders between people and countries. It’s not the right way. But we need to shut down the opportunities to misuse the Internet and prevent companies from rob people and nature for profit and we need to open the doors between people, giving welfare, knowledge sharing and freedom for everyone. This includes the homosexuals in Africa and Asia – and Russia (whatever comes from there)!

 

Animal Defenders International (ADI)
Last Chance for Animals (LCA)

 

We’re caught in a trap
I can’t walk out
Because I love you too much, baby
Why can’t you see
What you’re doing to me
When you don’t believe a word I say?
We can’t go on together
With suspicious minds (suspicious minds)
And we can’t build our dreams
On suspicious minds


* Want to know more about Chinese retraining camps ? google Human Rights Watch web page:

http://www.hrw.org/report/2018/09/09/eradicating-ideological-viruses/chinas-campaign-repression-against-xinjiangs

September 9, 2018
“Eradicating Ideological Viruses”
China’s Campaign of Repression Against Xinjiang’s Muslims

The quote below from this report by Human Rights Watch:

In many ways, the treatment of all Turkic Muslims in Xinjiang – those held inside detention facilities and those ostensibly free – bears disturbing similarities. Inside political education camps, detainees are forced to learn Mandarin Chinese, sing praises of the Chinese Communist Party, and memorize rules applicable primarily to Turkic Muslims. Those outside the camps are required to attend weekly, or even daily, Chinese flag-raising ceremonies, political indoctrination meetings, and at times Mandarin classes. Detainees are told they may not be allowed to leave the camps unless they have learned over 1,000 Chinese characters or are otherwise deemed to have become loyal Chinese subjects; Turkic Muslims living outside are subjected to movement restrictions ranging from house arrest, to being barred from leaving their locales, to being prevented from leaving the country. Inside, people are punished for peacefully practicing religion; outside, the government’s religious restrictions are so stringent that it has effectively outlawed Islam. Inside, people are closely watched by guards and are barred from contacting their families and friends. Those living in their homes are watched by their neighbors, officials, and tech-enabled mass surveillance systems, and are not allowed to contact those in foreign countries.

A  Swedish report: sns.se/aktuellt/sns-analys-nr-51-kinas-medier-politik-och-ekonomi/
http://www.sns.se/en/

China works on all levels, latest news: the President of Interpol  Meng Hongwei stationed in France has vanished during a visit to China.

Posted in animal rights, borders, create life, cultures, door openers, dreamers, hope, immigrants, living in the world, obstacles, opportunities, poems by vonnely, politics, reading, reality, right wing, Sweden view, Swedish "culture", Swedish conditions | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Dreamy lovers

 

 

 

 

 

If you are awake now, I’m certain you think of me.
If you sleep, I’m certain that you dream about me.
If you were here, our dream would be true reality
and our reality as we dream it should be. You still
want me and even if real meetings would not be as
we expected: in dreams we reach each other again.

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Moving, still steady

photo by vonnely November 18, 2017

I’ve lived in this house for ten years but
for the last years I’ve mostly been online,
it all while I tried to shake off my feelings
of wearing a cooling suit of loneliness and
desolation. Solitude has for long been my
curse and in times of despair I’ve wonder
why I’ve to suffer such burden and shame.
Sadness stays my only steady companion.

I’ll move to another house not far but still a
different road. But I fear I’ll repeat the same
pattern and a change will never come to me,
my love forever a dream never coming true.
But what he told me is true: that we became
lovers isn’t a miracle, the miracle is to meet.
Hope stays with us: a bright dot in dark, but
sadness stays as my only steady companion.

Now in process of leaving, a rearview mirror
has come to my eyes and I see the beautiful
surrounding nature here has fooled me my
loneliness and sadness were only a state of
mind and not for real. I’ve tried to be happy
and lived here long I know every tree but not
one single person, sadness my companion.
But I write about it because we are so many.

These alienated and cold neighbors around,
they can’t afford to give others a “hello, how
are you”: some lonely renters here have died
all alone only to be detected only by the smell
and then to be discreetly transported away in
slowly driving ambulances, not to bother any.
And sadness has been my steady companion,
while I combated bitterness, hate and grief.

But I’ve met a man and he insists on loving me
beyond what’s common and sensible. He lives
far away but he has also a steady place in my
heart. His love melts my frozen soul like butter
melts on hot toast and causing me little smiles
come to dance on my lips. Similarly, his friends
asks why he smiles so strange, but he can’t tell.
Sad to be apart, we’re still steady companions.

 

photo vonnely July 21, 2018, my present living

Posted in borders, create life, hope, loneliness, loners, love poem, maturity, memories, nature, online friends, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, reality, relationships, repression and borders, sadness, Swedish "culture", Swedish souls, walk of life, writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Dark chocolate love

And whenever we’ll meet I’ll offer you a piece
of dark chocolate and a cup of coffee. If you’re
hungry I’ll make you something to eat and if
you’re tired I’ll give you a bed to rest. But my
heart I’ve already given to you. It rests in you
wherever you go like my heart rests in you.

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Dancing smile

Standing in my kitchen, spreading butter
on a slice of toasted bread sprinkled with
poppy seeds and suddenly I sense a little
shy smile dancing on my lips: oh, it’s him
on my mind! I once melted like butter on
toast for his tender feelings to me. And it
lasts: his hot love that makes these little
modest smiles come to dance on my lips.

Posted in happiness, love poem, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, romance | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

So.. what happened in Sweden this Tuesday?

The Prime Minister was voted out of his post today. The new Speaker of the Parliament will now organize and lead the preparing talks with the party leaders in order to choose a candidate  for a new Prime Minister post with the task to form and lead the new government.

It will not be easy as there is 143 members for one bloc (four bourgeois parties united in “the Alliance”) and 144 for the other (two socialistic parties and one green party in cooperation). The third bloc is the nationalist party (the Swedish Democrats, common shortening to SD) has 62 members.

This third bloc act thumb on the scale, having demands to get power and influence. To enforce their demands they have promised to vote down every try to elect a new Prime Minister and later on make a new government unable to work on its budget – i.e. if they not get influence and power in the coming governemnt: primary over the migration politics.

The yesterday elections of the Speaker and his deputies will not have an effect on the coming government’s politic. Given these post the Speaker gains higher rank than all other member of Parliament, but he can’t longer act politically,  just be a moderator for the whole Parliament in work. Yet the process performed during yesterday elections for the new Speaker and his deputies showed that the majority of the parliament parties can handle this outsider extremist party with some cleverness and discrete cooperation. I think that is good and a bit promising for the coming four years.

Of more importance this day is that a law was clubbed, determining that a number of young people of Afghan origin will receive temporary asylum to finish their high school studies in Sweden. Those youngsters has lived in a hellish inhumane limbo of hope and despair the last few years, supported only in the daily life by voluntary groups of Swedes. But EU might will suspend this law.

More: the Chinese government has complained to Foreign Ministry about a satire program in Swedish TV. Given China’s treatment of Muslims in the country, it’s amusing anything from Sweden has annoyed the Chinese government. But the criticized satire program is actually not good and not at all fun but stupid – in my opinion. And I don’t waste my time watching such crap, but a trailer has been shown at the news when reporting about China’s official protest – and to me this satire seems tasteless, prejudiced and racist – just like the protest tells. But for China’s government there will probably be an upsetting discovery that the government in Sweden is not in control over any media. What a surprise for a brainwashing totalitarian dictatorship!

Further this Tuesday: I read today a chronicle written by an experienced journalist and political commentator. Just that she is such an experienced and well-known journalist and political commentator makes her text so shocking to read. She in her turn is upset that the racist party are maneuvered in the parliament by the other parties, saying that this is the end of our democracy and she fears the worse for Sweden in future.

This, she argues, is because we do not give the extremist party (SD) in the Parliament its rightful influence and we do it, so she says, because “we do not like their opinions.”

Now you well-educated middle class and middle age white lady woman: racism and oppression against others are not having “opinions”! It’s to strive to deny people their rightful places and influences in society among “us other” (native, straight, white, one-eyed or whatever) people in workplaces, housing and in Parliament and doing it by use a rhetoric that is offensive and insulting to individuals who are Muslims, immigrants, not of white complexion, women, Sami, Jews, homosexuals and…

Of 9 million inhabitants in Sweden, we have one million heartless and calcified humans – it’s 17,5 % of the voters in this September election – who have prejudices to all others millions living here and they take themselves the right to bully, troubling and limit the lives of certain groups that is made to be vulnerable people. Lady, who are you to defend those kind having that kind of goals?

It’s not so much the nature of reality that is the human problem, but how we choose to interpret the reality – and the consequences of our interpretations.

Posted in create life, immigrants, poems by vonnely, politics, reading, reading life, reality, repression and borders, right wing, Sweden view, Swedish "culture", Swedish conditions, web papers | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

“Träd föll över man – omkom” (Falling tree)

“Träd föll över man – omkom”: Det var en och samma irriterande rubrik i varenda dagstidning över hela landet den gångna måndagen – då inget speciellt hände annat än Sverigedemokraterna blev satta på plats i talmansvalen. Nu kommer tisdagen inrullande – och även om samma slags olycka antas vara osannolik två gånger i rad antas ändå statsministern idag få sparken från sitt ämbete. Träd faller över man…

 

 

 

 

“Tree fell over man – died”: One and the same annoying heading in every local and daily  newspaper across  my country this past Monday – when nothing special happened other than the nationalist party’s (Swedish Democrats) candidated for second and third deputy Speaker posts in Parliament was beaten, as he lost in all elections. Now comes Tuesday – and same unfortune is said unlikely to be twice in a row – though today the Prime Minister is expected to be fired. Tree falls over man…

(current) Swedish Prime Minister Stefan Löfven (until 2018?)

 

 

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Such is our togetherness (Sådant är vårt tillsammans)

my photo Oct 16 2014

I sit in my living room reading a novel that annoys me because its boring banality, even if I realize that is precisely the subject for the novel. (Loneliness in a spoiled middle class family, have it all and lack everything, far from how we two have it.) I sit here shaded by your absence, while a strong Indian summer sun out there heats and brightens up my room through its wide and high windows. I think of you and wonder what you are doing right now and if you are thinking about me too in this now. I imagine you are in a room with a lot of talking people around you and that you smiles and answers them all and no one has a clue that you are absent and far away in your thoughts, here with me and resting in the silence of my room, present and absent in the same now. Such is our togetherness.

Woman reading, painting by Robert James Gordon

Jag sitter i mitt vardagsrum och läser en roman som irriterar mig genom sin banala tråkighet, samtidigt som jag inser att just detta är romanens själva ämne. (Ensamheten i bortskämd medelklassfamilj, har allt och saknar allt, långt ifrån hur vi två har det.) Jag sitter här skuggad av din frånvaro, medan en stark brittsommarsol därutanför hettar och lyser upp mitt rum genom dess breda och höga fönster. Jag tänker på dig och undrar vad du gör just nu och om du också tänker på mig i detta nu. Jag föreställer mig att du är i ett rum och har fullt av pratande människor omkring dig och att du ler och svarar dem alla och att ingen anar att du är frånvarande och långt borta i dina tankar och här hos mig, vilande i min tystnads rum, närvarande och frånvarande i samma nu. Sådant är vårt tillsammans.

my photo from October 16, 2016

Posted in books, borders, dreaming, loneliness, love story, obstacles, poem in Swedish and English, poems, poems by vonnely, prose poem, reading, reading life, relationships, romance, sadness | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

A love story

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I know it is crazy you and I can be one and
we. Yet every inch of my skin talks and tells
about you exception for my feral and numb
feet. The day when we finally meet it will be
your task to fondle them to cry for you. And
I can imagine you will do just that, having
loving hands and a heart only for me.

 

 

 

 

Jag vet att det är helt galet att du och jag kan bli ett
och vi. Men varje tum i min hud pratar och berättar
om dig, förutom mina bortsprungna tondöva fötter.
Den dag när vi äntligen träffas, blir det din uppgift
att smeka dem till att ropa och begära dig. Och jag
kan tänka mig att du kommer göra just detta: dina
älskande händer och ett hjärta som bara är för mig.

Posted in Attraction, body image, dreamers, heartache, hope, longing, love story, poem in Swedish and English, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, relationships, romance | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Hen house

Part I, Saturday

It’s the weekend after Sweden voted for new leaderships in counties and parliament. The mandates for the parliament after the final statement is 144-143 to the favor of red/green bloc, but Swedish Democrats receives 62 mandates.

The current Prime Minister and his government hangs by a string, urged by the bourgeois bloc to hand over the baton. As there’s a third competitor fighting for power, the extreme right wing party Swedish Democrats, has promised to vote down any candidate if they are excluded from participating in the country’s governance: we have a deadlock!

But two blocs want us to believe it’s a fight between the two blocs, ignores the real power situation.

It’s Saturday morning when I starts to write this entry. I’m going to the library again this day and I wouldn’t dare to try to bike this time.

I woke up today with my right arm still hurting. Today it’s 17 days since I had my bike accident and my arm is still not fully functional. But it is better, I seldom have to take painkillers and I can (almost!) lift my arm to deodorize that right arm pitch without groaning.

But now and so far as writing this I have just had my coffee and read the online news. Far away: the hurricane Florence in US, the typhoon Mangkhut on the Philippines and Idlip Syria paused. But there is no news local and nearby! ??

So the broadcast websites writes about an increasing use of Viagra among young men. And my favorite paper writes about, well whatever… I started to read one of their chronicles instead making me laugh. As many of the papers chronicles are written by established novelists, they are very good and entertaining to read.

But meanwhile this amusing reading, I’m thinking: we got those terrible environment disasters, one after the other – and here at the local and after the election there’s just a dead lock. And chatters! The natural disasters should be the matter – and UNs Secretary-General urge all leaders and common people to see the big picture: the survival of the planet is on stake. The responses are too small and fragmented to give any effect or hope. All is so small and minor, like the local small green party fights for flight taxes to if possible limit air traffic… It’s small! It’s not enough!

Dead lock! The Swedish Democrates Party of course deny the imminent environmental threat and has just one mayor explanation to whatever problem they see: foreigners living here (especially Muslims), and demands as final solutions to whatever may be “no migrants in Sweden” “Sweden out of EU”.

But note, their election campaign emphasized “better healthcare” and “better pension for the elderly”. For whatever cause (I can’t explain), they gained so much votes they now have a swing role in the parliament.

Whatever candidate for the Prime Minister post any of the two blocks will suggest, the Swedish Democrats have promised they will vote them down in the parliament. That will be their strategy if not any block promise them increased influence and power and further: accept their migration politics.

Ultimate this strategy can lead to a new election – and the Swedish Democrats looking forward that scenario, as they believe that can give them even more scores and more power in a new coming government.

The opening now can only be found within the characters of the leaders of the so called “decent” parties in the two blocs. Yes, I’m mean precisely: in their personalities!

cover to a childrens book, nothing to do with my text

The current prime minister’s background as a single factory worker and welders are sometimes mentioned in political debates or in media. But it seems too easily forgotten he made a career from the factory floor and advanced to be a union leader. And he became trained to be a very skilled negotiator in difficult and locked labor disputes with the tough unbending employers of the time.
Therefore, the right wings conservatives should not rejoice too much, the old dog might wakeup to these peculiar situation and scent it as a morning air: and  he knows his craft!

And “he who laughs last laughs best”!

 

Part II, Sunday

The Saturday bus ride to the city and the library ended in bad spirit as I was mocked on the bus by two teenage girls from my rental area. This because I have mobile problems and walk with a stick. Yes! This, because I’m an old Swede and they are young migrant people.

(I think there can be a simple explanation to their misbehaving as they might overheard and misunderstood a conversation a Finnish woman had with me on the bus the day before, asking me if I am Swedish which I confirmed. Some Finnish people living in Sweden don’t like “foreigners”, but on the other side they have problems not liking native Swedes either. It’s a cultural conflict  beyond my understanding. So the girls are forgiven.)

But I’m moving in November from a rental area seemingly having a future as becoming another “no-go-area”. I’ve been thriving here, very much so – but I’m happy to get away  in time before it begin to smell rat for real.

People are trying to create a slum in my house area by deliberate littering in the common storage rooms, smashing shop windows and glass walls on the bus stops nearby. And people acts hostile to natives Swedes who are (still) living or visiting the area. The taxi driver badly refusing to help me the unfortunate accident day was a migrant. With such as the Swedish Democrats and nazis acting sluggers in the public room, “decent” people silent  as they don’t want to get those rasicts air under their wings. I told my son in phone,  but shshsh…

Most taxi drivers are immigrants, even though they have academic merits as medical doctors and engineers and – whatever! It takes about 8 years for an immigrant to get a job in Sweden and by then they have of course lost their original competence. Such competences Sweden starving for! It’s ironic!

The mistrust among immigrants against Swedes is in line with the formation of the Swedish Democratic Party. Yes, I blame the SD party for have created the last years of hostility and distance among immigrants against their neighbors.

It was once said that Swedes were difficult to get to know and it was true back then. Now it’s the opposite: new Swedes are impossible to get to know, they just don’t want you! I have lived the past ten years in a multi cultural area and have just had one foreign friend during all these years. I could as well have lived in the desert with just sand as my company!

We live in bad times that requires moral standards, personal strength and developed critical thinking in each individual.

I felt so ashamed the last week just before the election when I’m sitting in the bus home read an election poster at the street, saying “No more migrants to L***”. It was so embarrassing for me as a native Swede: this in my country! I don’t blame people from other countries if they react negatively, when they see and listen to such terrifying propaganda.

If you are constantly questioned and misrecognized, you will certainly be prickly as a hedgehog and hostile back.

We have a “no-no-talk-about” in Sweden. It’s in Swedish called “beröringsskräck”. A native Swede don’t dare to say anything that’s not “political correct”. And misunderstood  you’ll get mocked on the city bus – apparently! And if you breathe incorrectly some ambitious and zealous migrant will shout “Islamophobe” to you. It goes the both ways.

So we have many elephants in our little country room. And the SD party cheering. I fear the last laugh belongs to them in this matter!

It hurts! No healing offered!

And this Sunday morning I woke up with severe pain in my injured arm. I lubricated my upper arm muscle with sports ointment and took two painkillers. And then I could make my morning coffee.

On the Monday a week ago, I called the health center to get a doctor’s appointment for to look up this never healing arm that still causes me problems and disables me. And it worries me too!

The Swedish government brags of having a healthcare guarantee you will soon meet a doctor.

After you got the appointment, that is. They just forget to add you first must speak on the phone with a nurse and she decides if you will get a doctor’s appointment at all. As many others, I was denied an appointment – because my injury would heal over time. She said!


University Hospital in Linkoping, US, is one of the country’s seven university hospitals and is located in the region of Ostergotland. There are about 600 care places and about 5000 employees work there. The University Hospital treats patients in need of highly specialized care from all south-eastern Sweden.

Politicians regardless of party or bloc, focuses on specialist expertise in the health care and they put the money to build new and terribly expensive hospitals, all placed in the major cities. And now pregnant women travels for hours to get to a hospital. Coming there they are forced to give birth to the baby in the car at a parking place, refused to get a hospital bed. Assisted by the expectant father and horror-struck husband with no medical skills.

The sickness queues in Sweden can be more than a year for getting operations and people sometimes die before they receive care – or have become too sick to be treated.

This, while common and not life threating disorders such as pain in the back or hips or chronic sleeping problems and the like, are neglected and forces people to suffer for years and years, never getting any help.

But the primary for the healthcare is that the staff meet you in a friendly manner. No matter you will go home with nothing. They now try to expand this ambitions to demand that patients should be kind to the staff too!

Kiss my ass, frankly.

Did I wrote that the ultra-right wing party promised big an loud a better health care in their election campaign and especially better care for the oldest? Yes!

Yes! Those times – and it has been quite often the latest years, not getting younger – when I’ve been sitting in a waiting room at the health center, I always seems to be in company with a lot of extremely old people! “Where do they all come from?”, as Beatles once put it. And so much older than me! And I think “what do they get out this?”

And I think the forbidden thought we all elderly must cost the society a lot of money.

The Swedish Democrats says they want to protect “Swedish culture”! Well, maybe we should reintroduce the old “ättestupa” then?

Wikipedia: Ättestupa (Swedish for kin/clan precipice) is the mythical practice of senicide during Nordic prehistoric times: elderly people are said to have thrown themselves, or were thrown, to their deaths. According to legend, this was done when the old people were unable to support themselves or assist in a household. Even though there are many places in the Nordic countries that are said to have been used as ättestupa, today it is not thought that the practice actually existed, but that the notion of ättestupa is a persistent myth.

No, like all scammers the Swedish Democrats want to use the old and weak people for their own benefit.

In the middle of the past week I was having a dream in my sleep. I dreamed about the Swedish Democrats leader Jimmie Åkesson and meanwhile I heard Status Quo singing:

Whatever you want
Whatever you like
Whatever you say
You pay your money
You take your choice
Whatever you need
Whatever you use
Whatever you win
Whatever you lose
You’re showing off
You’re showing out
You look for trouble
Turn around, give me a shout
I take it all
You squeeze me dry
And now today
You couldn’t even say goodbye

And while Status Quo sang, stick drawings girls mingled into my dream, dancing cancan to the music.

Sudden pleased I then awoke, but the aching arm rapidly turned me down.

 

 

 

Posted in immigrants, inspiring music, inspiring songs, lost trust, maturity, obstacles, old age, poems by vonnely, politics, reading, repression and borders, right wing, satire, Sweden view, Swedish "culture", Swedish conditions, threatened | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The miracle to be loved

 

 

 

 

He’s the last one to be her first one,
yet if so the other in the family rank
In the complete desert in her aging
and of losses sad, weakened heart,
his lasting and devoted love keeps
the bitterness blood scraping gravel
away, holding her all free and loving
Still!

 

 

 

Posted in aging, armed loneliness, dreamers, heartache, loneliness, love poem, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, relationships, romance | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Sweden, seen by CNN and BBC

Saint George and the dragon, statue in Stockholm

Still in this messy times, we have stable media that try to provide a decent image of the outside world. As just  having my fuel for both breakfast and lunch, (coffee and toast sandwiches), I read two articles online about my home country Sweden and the coming election here. In spite what Swedish media has feared when reporting about how foreign journalists put a focus at Sweden conditions, it’s not a blackening image those two channels gives I just read. In any case not in these two articles.

The anti-migrant party Swedish Democrats (SD) has worked hard abroad to demonize the political and social situation in Sweden, luckily they seemed to have failed. This maybe because anti-democratic right-wing movements is flourishing over the whole western world at the moment. People everywhere know about these phenomena going on in the present.

But it’s a big time for intolerance and for the haters. Those people tries to scare normal people, but the only to fear are them, those hateful slanderer. Imagine only, for example, how local members of the SD party on their websites calling the Swedish female archbishop “Muslim whore” and the former Moderate Party and prime minister “jungle negro”… Remember the famous exclamation from Trump “And Sweden, what happens in Sweden!” Yes…

Some voices heard in the public room today is really both depressing and scary for common people. Every sign of people yet having love in their hearts is important as a wall against the devil. Every report keeping objectivity and common sense in the forefront is a sword against the evil dragoon. Every trustworthy article read make my coffee drinkable. Make my life easier to live in these dark times. Thanks to all who not let themselves be bewitched and lost!

As Sweden flirts with the far right, Europe holds its breath
By Rory Smith, CNN, September 8, 2018

Swedish election: PM says voting for anti-immigration SD is ‘dangerous’
BBC, September 8, 2018

BBC source Swedish parliament in image

Posted in poems by vonnely, politics, Swedish "culture", Swedish conditions | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Hot potatoes

I feel the smell of boiled potatoes from the kitchen newly put off the stove, still hot and now cooling off.

Newly boiled and still warm potatoes is “forbidden fruit” for a diabetic like me. This because a hot boiled potato contains 22/100 gram carbohydrates, which is far too much for those of us having blood sugar problems. But it’s okay to eat a potato that’s cooled, as when you cool it the most of the carbohydrates turns to resistant starch. It feed the bacterial culture in your bowels and it’s a good thing for you. Healthy poop, no spreading of stinky farts!

Luckily fried boiled potatoes is okay to eat, though in limited portions.

But it’s not just the boiled potato that you eat home in your kitchen you must cool down and give a pinch of salt before you consume it. It’s the most of what you hear and read “out there”, in the public room today. In the West today, the problem for the majority is not to get food for the day, but to filter the amount of information and disinformation that is forced on us all through television, internet media and paper magazines.

In most west countries we are spoiled with having free and independent journalism. This freedom we have is now under destruction by forces that want to undermine the foundations of the democratic society. Strong underground haters want to mess up your head to get the power to create repressive social systems.

It’s like living in a room there spiders creep around everywhere, on your walls and in your bed and in your head. You become confused and scared. What is true and what is lies?

And you got to know, not to go crazy and lose your confidence in the society and not to become a co-creator of societies like Hitler’s Germany, Franco’s Spain, Mussolini’s Italy, Mugabe’s Zimbabwe, you name it … If you get there once and will have such mess in decades of hell, you will ask yourself “how could it happened?” It could happen because you became enchanted by evil trolls that you allowed yourself to trust in.

We are no victims, but acting subjects and the responsibility is ours, always! But where do they come from, those who tries to spirited away people like you and me – and what do they want with demoralize the western democracies?

Sweden is a well-functioning country. The economy is flourish and the unemployment low. We have equality before the law. We are free to have whatever opinions, we are free to have whatever religious faith we have and we are free to love any person we want. You can’t prevent individuals from having prejudices, but no one has any legal right to discriminate anyone for skin color, religion or sexuality.

We have a well-developed welfare system that guarantees housing, food and care for all. Of course, we have poor people who have less choice to shape their lives and we have wealthy people with greater choice. But discrimination is about access to funds and not something integrated into the social system as you can see elsewhere. On the contrary, inequality is perceived as a problem for society, which is important to wipe out as far as possible.

A very few live on the street and a very few lives in castles, but in front of the law no one has a greater advantage than the other. That’s a fact.

On all this all the established political parties agrees. They disagree how to rule the society and what role the market have and should have, in order to keep our welfare and freedom system and improve it.

The key is the mixed economy. In Sweden we have block policy and we are stuck with it. Simply, either the left parties forming the government or the right parties do it. If you vote for either block you vote for 1. either to develop the mixed economy having a state control or 2. undermine it in advantage for a free capitalist market with less control from the state, the elected politicians and common people.

It is not more difficult than that. If you understand these mechanisms in the society machinery, you don’t have to ponder much what to vote for and you can spare your time and avoid all boring and noisy debates on TV where everyone tries to talk over the other and nobody listens to the other.

It’s now on September 9 the elections will be in Sweden to the parliament and to our counties.

The racist party Swedish Democrats (daily only called with the shortening SD) has succeeded to make “migration” to a high ranked topic in this election. It has been made to a hot potato and sadly every democratic party in the parliament has been forced to give some kind of a declaration about this matter.

During the last years SD and other dark sources of disinformation have succeeded to build up a vision of a Sweden in crisis, economically and socially. And it all is caused of the migration, they claims.

It took SD some years to succeed with this, but now SD control the potato agenda – oh: the political agenda, I mean! It’s really a success story and its leader is so happy for his luck he hardly can believe it’s true. But for normal people it’s a slow and painful wake up to a nightmare!

At the same, SD has almost succeeded to whitewash the racist label from the party. Though members of the party have problems to stay away from their close buddies neo-Nazi movement.

The other parties now call SD a “profiled right wing party”. That is really to give them too much credit! To have a conservative political view has nothing to do with anti-democratic endeavors, xenophobia and racism and to make certain groups of people in the society to scapegoats.

SD party is to compare with Front National in France and National Front in UK, similar in roots and fix ideas. (I would not give their world views a credit calling it an ideology, rather it is people with certain idiosyncrasies gathering in groups of intolerant idiots, fearing especially people who are Arabs, Muslims, Jews, Africans, women and homosexuals.

It is clear SD spreads delusions and lies about the Swedish society in both US and far away as in Australia. Even if its leader deny it and wash his hands like Pontius Pilate when asked about it. He and those alternative medial calls themselves “patriots”.

A pen pal in Australia in her 75s wrote this to me:

I do not believe everything that I hear but sometimes you have to wonder just how much truth there might be in an article that you read. Let’s face it no place on earth is perfect. Every country has both its good points and its drawbacks and no one and nothing is perfect. Someone sent me an email that made Sweden seem to be a very unhappy and unsafe place since they have taken in so many refugees. I would imagine that someone is determined to make it look unsafe. I have always thought of Sweden as being a lovely place. We all have our problems and our issues that is for sure. It makes me wonder how much is true and how much is made up to make things look bad?

It was a chain-letter. Why did she get it? I really don’t understand the importance for SD to run campaigns in US and Australia? But of course it’s just a brick of worldwide warfare governed by Russia caused by the perceived and real threat some years ago of NATO sniffing Ukraine in the butt.

That was a real hot potato for Putin and he didn’t cool it off but told West “you will eat in hell” – and now we do!

(Putin himself is a real hot potato that must be cooled down. But not even with salt he will taste good. Luckily he’s 65 year old and he’s not getting younger. There will be a time after him – for us as well as for Russia.) For now Russian money and “alternative media” fabrics and so called trolls are highly active in the democratic elections all over in the western world’s democracies.

Those local members in groups and parties in Sweden linked to these evilness calls themselves “patriots”? But what kind of patriotism is it to smudge and blackening the own country with spreading lies abroad. These people use the democratic society’s rules to undermine it. See how Donald Trump acts in US and you got the picture.

I saw in a newspaper and image of a young woman holding a cute puppy and the headline was “I’m afraid to live in Sweden today”. It was an article in one of our common newspaper and not in so called “alternative media”.

So even established media as BBC seeing themselves as serious channels for information are spreading confusing images about our country. They paint images of burning cars but have they ever visit a Swedish kindergarten? Or a Swedish healthcare center? Or a leisure activity for retirees on a voluntary basis or the similar for schoolchildren but an obligation by municipality society? You get what you’re looking for!

That girl’s fear tells us nothing about Sweden today, but if her fear is real she need psychological treatment! And the newspapers publish such bullshit should take a minute for reflection and consider their social responsibility.

Furthermore, I’ve heard our capital town Stockholm is called “rape city” abroad. That’s really disgusting. If I would choose to walk alone in any city in the world at night, I would choose Stockholm! And I truly mean it!

But there are certainly streets and parks I would avoid in the middle of the night, and that goes for everywhere in the world and even so in Sweden. You can sing the lullaby “The lions sleeps tonight” but I won’t believe you.

Predators will always be there and they don’t sleep at night, nor in the day. But life must be handled, if in well as in bad, and if you can’t protect yourself – you need help from other humans! In Sweden you can at least demands to get a treatment, even if the resources for young people is too limited.

That would be a good issue to discuss ahead the election: today assess to get mental care and support for children and youngsters! And not take up the time to debate if to allow the short exclamations of Friday prayer from Swedish mosques or not. That’s just silly as long Swedish church bells ringing every Sunday and on every funeral there is.

But when a politician tries to discuss essentials, some sophisticated journalist who thinks she’s so damned clever inflicts with a question about “beggars” or “refugees” or similar, in fact she’s running the SD errands.

And then Swedish TV can arrange a debate why SD have had such successes. Well, we all participate in the community game, don’t we? One way or another.

The leader of another political party, the Christian Democrats, said in an interview that she is not sure that “a multicultural society” is compatible with Swedish values. I would rather claim that in view of our Swedish laws and our political aspirations in such as the EU and UN, freedom and multiculturalism are exactly Swedish values, which we have to stand up for.

Has this “Christian” woman never read the New Testament? Ever heard about Jesus, lady?

The Swedish Democrats claims they want to nourishing “Swedish culture” and what can be more “Swedish culture” than a dinner plate with boiled potatoes, now airing from my kitchen? It’s genuine Swedish food, right!

But of course, google it and you discover this root is once upon a time imported from South America. So what to do?

While media and politicians in the society are fooled to debate beggars and migrants and violent crimes, the Baltic Sea is dying and dying and it just goes on year after year. The Sami people are still discriminated by the state authorities. The beggars we see on streets are often gypsies coming here because they are discriminated in Romania. And the discrimination of Romani people has been existing in Sweden since 1600s. Now they are EU-citizens and they are on our table, whether we like it or not and we can’t forbid them to exist!

Another issue that should be on the table is that we have corruption in Sweden. And even if it’s low compare to… it’s steady increasing, and this can happen because we don’t talk much about it and don’t want to see this as a Swedish problem. We prefer to argue about some beggars on the street, being too visible for our over-sensitive eyes.

We live no doubt in a prosperous country, but the public discourse today is simply disgusting. And it’s the loud and arrogant anti-democratic groups that must be blamed for this.

So congrats to all the destroyers and rapists of all what are good in this country, hoist the flag and sing the national anthem, all while we’ll sink down into a wasted land in violence and misery!

Cheers, bold Viking! BBC now pays you back for ancient times rapes, murders and robberies on the English coast some hundreds of years ago.

One member of the Swedish Democrats is even Deputy Speaker in the parliament – and that is as honorable as being king or prime minister – said earlier this year in an interview that Jews and Same are not real Swedes. Imagine only an American politician saying Jews and Indians are “no real Americans”!

The SD party leader made a medial scandal the other day as he in an interview in a radio channel on Swedish Broadcast, claimed he would close down that channel if he would get in a ruling political position. Saying any like that he can easy be to compare with president Erdogan in Turkey! Being a “real Swede” by his own definition he doesn’t even know a politician cannot close down any media in Sweden. Especially not a broadcast channel!

What do SD wants for Sweden? Who knows, but it’s not any good! But whatever is a nail in their eyes, it’s the Muslims fault! Forbid all immigration to Sweden and all problems and imperfections in our society are solved and us a personal happiness will be given!

Hallelujah!

Posted in borders, cultures, fooled, immigrants, living in the world, Mr Putin, opportunities, poems by vonnely, politics, Putin, reading, reality, repression and borders, right wing, Sweden view, Swedish "culture", walls, web papers | Tagged , | Leave a comment

The bike accident


University Hospital in Linkoping, US, is one of the country’s seven university hospitals and is located in the region of Ostergotland. There are about 600 care places and about 5000 employees work there. The University Hospital treats patients in need of highly specialized care from all south-eastern Sweden.

I had an accident with my bike on Thursday 30 August as passing through the hospital area. I was on my way downtown to the local library. Over the last decade, extensive new construction of the hospital area is carried out and as living here in the city and nearby, it seems to go on forever. I had just biked past a sign that said “in 2022 we will have our first patients in this building”. And now when google it, it is said it all will be finished by 2024.

To cycle through the hospital area is shortest ride from my home but it can still at times be a mess to bike this way. You might have to jostles with all sorts building machines, asphalt pavers, locked roads and sidewalks and temporary road signs telling where to go and not to go, taxi cars, city buses and also ambulances now and then. And a lot of people walking everywhere or waiting at the bus stops, because even though the hospital is under construction, it’s in full use.

Due my difficulty in passing through this area, I have for latest years always a helmet on my head when cycling. But actually the bike road seems to be clear now, yet you have to hold your eyes open and bike on one side of the road, look up for stops to move to the other side – and try to understand the purposes with it all those passages. And I don’t. And I didn’t this Thursday!

I had just walked over a crossing point with my bike and was ready to continue biking when my right foot slipped on the pedal and it started to spin. I slipped again when I tried to put my foot on the ground and unfortunately I lost my balance and fell over the handlebar. The fall was sudden and out of control and forwards and I fell very heavily and hard on my shoulder. The pain was indescribable and the shock came instantly. And I was stuck in the bike and couldn’t move.

But a woman came as sudden as I had fall running for my help. She said she was a doctor and examine my shoulder. Nothing broken but the pain was still unbearable. She wanted me to move up on my feet. But I couldn’t. Two other young women, medical students they later told me before they left me, came and removed the bike from my body – and again I was asked to get up on my feet. I said I couldn’t because I was too heavy to get up from the ground. “I’m too fat”, I said, “to get up on my own”. It was not a situation to be embarrassed about that. Another girl came and four people lifted me up and even four of them – I could see it was not easy for them. And I can understand that as I’m 1,60 tall and weight 99 kilo (5,3 feet/218 lb) and my joints are stiff and rather immobile even normally.

But I came up on feet and apparently I was not dying, nothing was broken and no sign of stroke or a heart condition. My eyes could focus and I could respond talked to and all visible was a bleeding elbow.

And as sudden those people had come to my rescue as sudden they were gone.

But I was dizzy, nauseous and the pain was still overwhelming. The area around me looked empty of people. Everyone seemed to have absent themselves, although I saw people discreet glanced at me on the other side of the street. I could even recognize at least one or two from my housing area – they recognized me too.

But I didn’t understand how to get myself from there I were.

But I was the only left and shaky I lifted up my bike and wondered what the best to do was. Try to bike to the library as planned? Or bike home again? I was on my way to return a novel and it was a short time loan and last day to return the book without getting a fee. I made a lame attempt to get on the bike again, but I was too shaky. And the bike handlebar had been twisted. So I looked around to find a place to park the bike. But all bike racks were occupied on that side of the street.

I could hardly imagine myself walk to the other side because of the pain and still being in a kind of shock state, so shaking. But slowly I began to walk. And I was still looked at by people who pretended they did not see me, but holding a distance. I could really not care about that!

Shaking and in such a pain, still with that awful nausea and now scared too, I parked and locked my bike and wobbled slowly to a bus stop about 20 meters away and fell ungainly down on bench. Luckily the bus came in a few minutes. Holding my harmed arm with the other I entered the bus and took a sit. Five minutes later I was downtown and began to slowly walk towards the library. I was still holding my right arm with my left hand as the pain still was severe and I had to held it up to ease the hard pain. I was limping. People stared at me.

But I was only thinking: how will I be able to get home? When I passed the cathedral I rested on a bench and called my son. He lives 200 kilometers away and was at work and didn’t answer my call. But as it has been some health conditions with me before the latest years we have an agreement, therefore he called me back in a few minutes. I told him my situation and asked him to call a taxi for me. As saying I had no phone number available and I was in too bad condition to be able to go into the library and google for a phone number and so on… He said I should get to a doctor and I said a doctor had get me up on feet and she let me go away, so it could not be that bad. And I had no intend to see a doctor that same day and pay 200 SEK to be told to come back after a week to check up the arm…

He agree to my request and called for a cab and I struggled further the 200 meters left to the library and returned the book in the automat and went to wait outside the building for the taxi.

It came in a few minutes and I told the driver that I had been in an accident with my bike and injured my arm. He didn’t seem to understand my condition and that I needed help to open the car door. But after several tries, he finally bend over to open the door for me. A little! Very little actually! I still had to push it up with my knee to get in – and somehow put myself on the seat in the car. Only that was quite exhausting. And then I had to ask him to help me put on the seat belt. It was a little odd that I had to ask him to help me because my problems were so obvious, but I was in so much pain that I could not really think about his strange lack of interest.

He seemed still not be aware about my awful situation when we arrived at my yard and front door. I had a problem to pay for travel with one hand and then again to open the car door. He just waited impatiently and when he showed no intention to help me, I solved my problem with finally kick up the door with my foot. But then my bag fell out on the ground and my wallet and other things fell out of the bag.

And now I had the delicate task to bend down to ground trying not to fall on my head and shoulder again and pick up my things – and then to get out of the car. My shoulder was still in such a pain so I had to avoid every move get it worse. (Like making me shout straight out of pain and totally loose it!)

The driver certainly didn’t help me and a couple of parents with kids on the children’s playground looked curiously at me. But I got up on my feet and left the car.

The driver turned the car and was ready to drive off. I turned around when I had succeed to open the front door to see if he even cared to look after how I was doing. It did not seem like that. And he had also told me during the drive it was his last drive for the day. So what did he care! He only wanted to get home – and so did I.

And when I came in to my apartment I just sank down my poor body in an armchair and sudden I was filled with such a strong longing for someone living far away, to be there and take care of me. As I was such a complete mess. But love is no reason to get a visa to Sweden.

Five days have passed since this accident. The pain is significantly less but the arm is still weak and not usable. And here I am – a single and one-armed elderly lady, holding the one hand with the other, trying to do daily life things with one arm. It was firstly yesterday I discovered I had got big bruises on my pelvis and stomach too. So I guess it was a really serious fall accident. I will recover, but when you becomes elderly accidents like this frightens you, as you fear what future will give you.

My intention with the visit to the library had also been to pre-vote for the election on the coming Sunday when we Swedes choose which politicians will rule for us in parliament and counties for the next coming years. Of course, I could not do that. So I will vote on the big Election Day on Sunday as the most of us use to do.

We all citizens are requested by our political parties, no matter what program they represents, to vote for what kind of society we want.

But the society, that’s us.

Posted in armed loneliness, fragile, loneliness, loners, morality, Poetry, reality, Swedish conditions, walk of life | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Love-potion mystery

 

 

 

 

 

Aubrey Beardsley (1872 –1898)

 

 

On the other side of the globe, a man walks
on a street late in night heading home to sleep
and while he walks he thinks of the one he loves
and the thought makes him smile and far away
in a dark room his beloved smiles back. It all
for what we don’t know but trust and need;
the mystery of love which science can’t explain!

But I’m bored of my constant nagging about love
and longing and missing! What about a modest
life with simply tea and sympathy? “But I can’t
forget about you!” he said. “Not even for a nice
cup of Moroccan mint tea!” “Okay then!” I said.

 

 

På andra sidan jordklotet går en man
på en gata sent i natten, hemåt för att sova
och medan han vandrar, tänker han på den
som han älskar och tanken får honom att le
och långt borta i ett mörkt rum ler hans
älskade tillbaka. Detta allt, för vad vi inte vet
men litar på och behöver; kärlekens mysterium
som vetenskapen ännu inte har kunnat förklara.

Men jag är uttråkad på min ständiga tjat om
kärlek och längtan och saknad! Vad sägs om
ett anspråkslöst liv med bara vanligt te och
sympati? “Men jag kan aldrig glömma dig!”
sa han. “Inte ens för en kopp marockanskt
mintte!” “Okej då!” sa jag.

 

 

 

Posted in Attraction, dreamers, love poem, love story, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, romance, sexuality | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Sometimes I sense your presence in my room

 

Aubrey Beardsley (1872 –189

 

 

 

Sometimes I sense your presence in my room
as if you actually were here with me and close.
Over time, I’ve had to give up my attempts to
be sensible and wise about us and give you up.
As “we” is something that’s not possible to be.
But this “we” exists! Sometimes I ask you “but
what if we came to live together openly and if
people got to know it and gossip about it and
doomed you?” Then you tell me you wouldn’t
care. And in truth all we have is here and now!

 

Posted in afar, dreamers, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, reality, rebellious lovers, romance, secret love | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Forsaken lover

Har du övergett mig?
Aldrig mer din mjuka röst?
Vintern kom tidigt!

Have you forsaken me?
Never more your soft voice?
Winter came early!

 

 

 

 

Two great Swedish music artists: Totta Näslund sings the lyrics written by Dan Helander!
The original lyrics is written with an ABAB rhyming. It’s not easy to translate word for word and still follow a rhyme schedule, so my translation is not fully word by word but  very close. Actually more than translated lyrics use to be. 🙂

“A clown in my clothes” Swedish lyrics by Dan Hylander

There is a clown wearing my suit,
he swear everything is just fine.
He looks so sunny and cute,
losing you didn’t make him to whine.
He’s the last one leaving any pub,
drinking mostly more than any other.
He may puke and cry behind a shrub
but never admit he’ll ever bother.

Come home again, come home again!
It’s enough, you win! But darling: come home again!

There is a buffoon in front of you,
he’s hiding his tears in laughter,
He rushes wildly away from you,
but sees your shadow running after.
And he has never been able to show
that he feels hurt and lost in the wood.
Whatever the fool wants to prove,
he is constantly misunderstood!

Come home again, come home again!
It’s enough, you win! But darling: come home again

When you left, everything cracked
and fell apart in his life,
He’s the loser you left behind your back,
has no future without his wife!
There is a clown wearing my suit,
he swears everything is just fine,
and pretends to be sunny and cute,
but losing you makes him want to whine!

Come home again, come home again!
It’s enough, you win! But darling: come home again!

My darling come home, come home, come home again!
It’s enough, you win! But darling: come home again!

My darling come home, honey come home again!
It’s enough, you to win! But darling came home again!

“En clown i mina kläder” (Dan Hylander)

Det står en clown i mina kläder,
Svär att allting är okej,
Han låtsas solig i alla väder,
Och lever lycklig utan dig,
Han är den siste hem från krogen
Och har som oftast druckit mest,
Han är sin livslögn evigt trogen,
Och tror att livet är en fest

Kom hem igen, Kom hem igen,
Det räcker, du vinner, men älskling kom hem igen

Det står en pajas i din spegel,
Och döljer tårarna i skratt,
Han rusar fram för fulla segel,
Men ser din skugga nå ifatt
Och han har aldrig kunnat visa,
Att han är sårad och försmådd
Vad än den dåren vill bevisa,
Så blir han ständigt missförstådd

Kom hem igen, kom hem igen,
Det räcker, du vinner, men älskling kom hem igen

Sen du försvann har allting rämnat,
Och fallit samman i hans liv,
Han är förloraren du lämnat,
Helt utan framtidsperspektiv
Det står en clown i mina kläder,
Och svär att allting är okej,
Han låtsas solig i alla väder,
Men är förlorad utan dej,

Kom hem igen, Kom hem igen,
Det räcker du vinner, men älskling kom hem igen,

Min älskling kom hem, kom hem, kom hem igen.
Det räcker, du vinner, men älskling kom hem igen.

Min älskling kom hem, älskling kom hem igen,
Det räcker du vinner, men älskling kom hem igen

 

Posted in inspiring songs, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, romance, sadness, Swedish artists, Swedish souls, translations by vonnely | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Children of divorce, left behind

Children of divorce, left behind.
When one or both parents find
new love, they cut off the past:
what’s old luggage comes last.
And children can be neglected,
needing loving care is rejected.

I was talking on phone with my grown son about an episode of a TV serial I had been watching the other evening. One of the characters was a man who after his divorce found a new love and was crazy happy about it. The problem was only that the new woman could not accept his daughter from his previous marriage and was jealous and angry for the time he spent with the child. Every adult in the circle tried to manipulate all the other – and the child! The woman almost succeeded to make the man to abandon his child (and I was jumping up and down in my armchair, shouting “what are you doing, what are you doing…!!”) Finally, the man was forced to choose between the love of the child and his romantic love. And to my relief, he came to senses and let the woman go her own way.

I told my son this story and said “but things like that only happened in old days, like stories told about children rejected to stay on a mattress in the basement by bad parents, but I think people knows better nowadays”. My son who works as a youth leader said “you wouldn’t believe how often I’ve got to know about such family situations in my job, children who are neglected and banished to sleep alone in the basement, parents are as negligent and selfish now as in the past, it’s terrible but it’s the pale truth even today.” And yes, I was shocked and disgusted of what he told me.

It’s terrible how insensitive and ruthless adults can be to children. And there is no excuse for to be it, as we all have been children and know how it is. Children should certainly not be spoiled, but I think it must be less harmful for a child to be spoiled than being denied and abandoned by an immature and childish parent.

But children, they are a responsibility for every adult person in the society. And a good-hearted teacher or youth leader can be chosen by a child to fulfil the need to have someone to look up to.

Some people believes in angels and guardian angels as some kind of supernatural creatures. I certainly don’t! But what is a guardian angel? A guardian angel is what you become when you are chosen to be it by someone who needs you!

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted in loneliness, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, relationships, romance | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Moving (and got a life crisis)

 

The silent walls given me, they have become too
toxic for me. Though I have loved to live in this
area with all the lovely nature close by. But I will
leave behind what is in changes to become a bad
rental area. And I will move to a so called “better
area” and getting a flat with a better comfort for
an older lady like me. And in my new flat I will get
new wallpapers and I’ve chosen to let the walls in
my new home  be wallpapered in soft pink and
enchanting apricot. That’s for bedroom and hall.
The walls in my living room the walls will get a
beige multicolored floral wallpaper – just a bit like
a mature lady, still girly with a discreet summer’s
timid charm; shy flirting yet chaste in mind. All for
dreams, still there, never age! Well, I’m not young
but he knew it all the time and still it didn’t bother
him as it embarrassed me – should have! “Let go”
would have been too easy to say! And I didn’t.

I will anyway very likely end up alone, a single
living old woman –  with a cat? It’s a gloom!
What would be to look forward to?

A lady friend, a woman of 75 and married since
decades back wrote me the other day: “me and
my husband, we thank the Lord every morning
we wake up, still alive just for another day!” I
believe her because in just a few years I will be
in the same age as this couple. Not religious!

Old people like us, we have really no “future” and
that greenery seen in front of us is not a promising
meadow, but more to compare with “the green mile”:
at the end a corridor, “Death” stands in the doorway
greeting us with grim “hello” Hu! I’m all too aware
about so I can’t get grip on this eerie reality. So:
what’s the point with choosing new wallpapers?

 

 

 

 

It’s August now and summer will soon end. The rowan trees
blushes outside my bedroom window as every year but this
year I clean out stuff for to later pack the things I want to bring
with me to my new living. It’s creepy really: I’m going 70 next
year: so do I really believe I have anything to look forward to?
I’ve been in the housing queue ten years to be able to move
to a more “comfortable” housing (and with a better reputation,
yes I admit this!) But if I must be in queue as long as a decade
if for a next and a good place, I might end up with a nice spot
on the city’s burial site! (Don’t tell me to shut up and not be
“morbid”, it’s true realistic!) Anyway, in the near future I will
create my new nest, make it to a nice place, there to rest from
my passed disillusions and whatever. And if it never will be him –
and it can likely be so, I can get a lapdog to love, to share with
me and my old calico cat this new cozy and undisturbed place
with its soft pink and apricot walls, safe and afar from the rough
world (where he dwells and lingers. And (I hope) I will be fine!
(Even if I seems to be in the middle of a crisis at the moment!)

 

View from my bedroom window photo by vonnely August 14, 2015

Posted in aging, create life, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, relationships, walk of life | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Dressed in white (listening to J M Baule)


DE BLANCO ME VESTIRÉ
José Mª Baulenas 2000
jmbaule.bandcamp.com

TRANSLATIONS BY ME TO SWEDISH AND ENGLISH,
original lyrics below the video

I vitt ska jag klä mig

Jag har en soluppgång
målad i mina minnen, många
kärlekar, glömskor och en evig tro
och vattnet som var hans gåva

Jag känner mig fri
när jag flyger som fågeln förbi
Mot stjärnan där som på himlen ler
hon, du vet, som alla mina steg ser

Om skuggor från vad som var förr
kommer tillbaka till mig och min dörr
Och jag fruktar att min lycka vänder
då håller jag alltid i dina händer

Tillsammans, du och jag i hamn
ska en gång vila i varandras famn
Mellan saltet och honungen
bär jag i mitt bröst en sång

Och i vitt ska jag vara klädd
med min själs alla broderier

Och i vitt ska jag vara klädd
med min själ som min gåva

 

 

In white I will be dressed

Traits of a sunrise, painted
in my memories, loves now faded,
forgettings and a faith lasting
And the water for me you’re giving

I feel free to fly
like a bird passing by
and that star you see up in the blue
she follows me at my every view

If shadows from what was my past
comes back to my attention as last
And I feel down like I’m falling,
it’s your hands I always holding

With time, you and I will be faced
and together united in an embrace
Between the salt and the honey
In my breast I carry a song

And in white I will get dressed
With my soul as an embroidery

And in white I will get dressed
With my soul given as a gift

 

Rasgos de un amanecer
En mis recuerdos pintado
Amores, olvido y la fe
Y el agua que me has regalado

Libre me sentiré
Volando como ave de paso
Aquella estrella que ves
Hasta ella llevo mis pasos

Sombras se fueron de ayer
Al presente yo le hago caso
Y si me siento caer
Me sostienen siempre tus manos

Juntos, tu y yo de una vez
Nos fundimos en un abrazo
Entre la sal y la miel
En mi pecho llevo un canto

Y de blanco me vestiré
Con mi alma como bordado

Y de blanco me vestiré
Con mi alma como regalo.

https://jmbaule.bandcamp.com/track/de-blanco-me-vestir

Posted in copied lyrics, inspiring music, inspiring songs, love poem, poem in English and Swedish, poems by vonnely, translations by vonnely, writing | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

To stay authentic within the limits of life

 

 

 

 

He had been her friend and guardian angel
for long as he had held the gate to the tomb
of loneliness locked and at the same he had
kept a door ajar to what could have become
love and tenderness and belonging in world.
But who fools whom in a deceitful world of
desires and frustrations? She feared and still
fears the others and all demands in life and
her own mortality and she fears to be alone.
But hopes on ice turns deadly cold with time
and even though the lonely one is not strong,
at least she can be true and authentic within
the limitations that became her life and world.
You must recognize the lonely one’s courage!

 

Posted in create life, living in the world, loneliness, loners, maturity, morality, obstacles, opportunities, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, relationships, repression and borders, romance, walk of life | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Composted forgettings

Before you say “forget about it”,
maybe you should tell me what
it is I should forget about? You
carry a whole trash bin with all
these “forget it” and I fear I will
one day get all yours “forget it”
in anger thrown all over me.

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August trail

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kissed by the shadow of what could have been,
him gone when August arrived in cooling nights
with its Moon’s Mona Lisa smile. And it darkens
a little bit more every day. All we know for sure:
we are all mortal and we’ll leave life one by one
all alone. But our foolish hearts always trembles
for more: the magical promise of an eternal love
in the eyes of “the other”. Not a word of farewell,
but he might lost hope of what was never there.
For me remains to look for more walkable trails.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

John Bauer, Prins i Månland (Prince in Moon Land by the Swedish painter John Bauer 1882 -1918)

 

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Crisis can create creativity!

An area that’s burning in Northern Sweden is a military shooting field with undetonated ammunition in the terrain, nobody allowed to enter. Today, Army force tries to bomb the fire, to stifle the oxygen supply to the fire. I’m mighty proud of this bold and innovative try of the Swedish forces! 🙂

 
http://www.svt.se/nyheter/lokalt/dalarna/har-slapper-jas-planet-bomben-i-alvdalen
http://www.aftonbladet.se/nyheter/a/J1AxvX/flygvapnet-slapper-bomber-over-branderna
http://www.dn.se/nyheter/sverige/gripenplan-bombar-skjutfaltet-vid-trangslet/

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“It could be worse!”

Have a bad government with confused ministers who don’t know how to find their own hands in their pockets, wishing for another reign but realise the alternative we would get an even worse government that is not footed, but for certain will make everything worse for everyone except those who are already too rich, then what you got? A desillusioned mind and a frustrated distrust of politicians, the kind of mind created that has fed parties like those who reigns in Poland and Hungary and leaders like Le Pen and Donald Trump. Standing here though happy not to live in Turkey, Iran, Saudi Arabia, Venezuela and several other terrible countries… Standing here, trying to be comforted that it could be worse!

Posted in create life, dreaming, fooled, heartache, living in the world, lost trust, morality, poems by vonnely, politics, repression and borders, Sweden view, Swedish conditions | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

När skogen brunnit ned (When the forest has burned down)


När skogen brunnit ned
och vilar svart och förkolnad
spirar ny grönska fram som
bidat sin tid under många år.
Vi ser att det som förbrändes
gödde det som skulle komma.
Och vi går här nu, du och jag.

 

Svedjenäva (Geranium bohemicum)

(for once I wrote  my poem in Swedish and made a try to translate it)

When the forest has burned down
and rests black and charred, new
greenery sprouts that has bided its
time for years. We see what was
burnt, nourished what would come.
And now we walk here, you and I.

 

 

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Perspective (world closer my door I almost got my toes toasted)

Enskogen outside Ljusdal, Sweden, July 17, 2018

I usually start my day with coffee while I check the news from the world on the web. And ”the world” is somewhere on the other side of Oresund Bridge. But now ”the world” has come close to my own doorstep!

We have had a terrible dramatic heat wave in Sweden since the end of May, resulting later in summer to no or limited feed for the cattle and farmers forced to sent some of them for emergency slaughter and further came reports of expected poor harvests. And since a week back the situation has escaleted to a lot of devastating and dramatic and extensive forest fires. Rain was promised for the week, but at Monday the 16th it was clear no rain was in sight. But the whole country was actually burning, from almost north to almost the south.

A day or two ago about a dozen forest fires were out of control and all over around the country 60 fires was about. Now there are three to four forest fires out of control and yesterday about fifty all forest areas burning. Today it’s down to ”only” fortifour” fires. Only rain can solve the crisis, is said – and rain is not expected for several weeks ahead!

Our crisis has got attention abroad. I read in one foreign media telling ”arctic areas” in Sweden are burning. It’s not. The landscape Härjedalen (for example) in Sweden is a bit above Stockholm, but it’s certainly not an arctic area! 😊 😊

But it’s all true we actually have a catastrophe here right now. Which we aren’t used with to have and we had some problems to incorporate it in our minds at first. Disasters of any kind are namely something that happens abroad and far away and in areas that are less, less,less… (something)not orderly and organized as in our little country. ☹

A common man in an area where inhabitans was going to be evacuated told a reporter the other day: “Well, I’m told to leave, but I won’t. I’m staying because I’ve planned a fishing trip tonight.” (Hello, my name is Sven and my surname is Stupid.) (Can you hear the Swedish accent?) 😊

Earlier in the week a women in her 70s told a reporter she had said to a military man ”you can’t force me to leave my house and he said ’actually I can’ and he grabbed me and pushed me and my hubby away”. And then she added ”I think he saved us!”! Yes, well…

But I can’t imaging how it would be like to leave the house that’s your home and not knowing if you ever will see it again – and all your stuff and all memories they hold! I could see on TV people carry out their cats and some things in bags and they drived away crying.

Around 400 to 500 people from some villages and farms have been evacueted. It’s a luck it’s sparsely populated areas and so far no people has been harmed.

And I think we got it now, the fact we have a catastrophe situation ”in Sweden!” and that we as a unit actually is as part of the world. (Yes, ”in Sweden, who would believe that”, as Donald once said.)

The crisis at first got even worse as our own local rescue services don’t have sufficient resources, so Sweden gets help from Norway, Litaua, Poland, Denmark, Italy, France and Germany. And the contributions from the other countries have made a big and successful difference!

Not only ordinary people in the fire brigades but even the government members realizes now (I hope!) we must have a more developed defence against environmental disasters.

And finally, the Army too has joined the fire fighting (forest fires are not on their table and most of the staff have their vacations now and union rules prevents us from force people back on duty, a military leader said at first to media). (Nice to know, Putin said!) But then someone important leader must have said something in fury to someone other leader on another authority – and now all resources are gathered and cooperates. Good!

Swedish authorities are independent entities and seems unable to cooperate without complicated regulatory systems. It’s not uncommon individuals and events “fall between the chairs”, as it is called. Decision-makers excuses that otherwise would risk democratic principles and values and methods, but it seems more likely to be about bureaucracy, prestige, stubbornness and inside corruption cultures among leaders of organizations.

But there are really no time for reflections but actions at the instant moment, but it surely will be investigations afterwards by government and authorities how to improve the civil defense for the future.

Normally when authorites in dramatic situations makes statement on TV they tell people not to worry and live as normal, but this time we are warned not to underestimate the situation – and that’s uncommon, actually, to be strongly warned! But uncontrolled forest fires are a horrific life danger. Only the pictures are scary enough! (If I only were able to copy them from the web, but they are protected.)

We, the public; are told only rain can save us from this disaster – and we are told it can takes several weeks more before it will come rain!

Actually the staff forces working to fight the fires are exhausted of day and nights overtime work without sleep and rest – their efforts are the kind of heroes!

No end is thus promised, but it surely will be! And I believe it will come rain sooner than the crisis manager on the governing authority of civilian crises (MSB) sees from his perpective! The problems now are not to get people of different catogories and positions to understand the danger or not to get resources enough to fight the fires. The risk factors are now winds, thunders and fires going underground hiding deep down in the soil.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Add: Since I wrote this entry the number and extent of the fires in Sweden have increased. And not only Sweden is haunted in Europe. I had no reason to be optmistic really! The best is Poland sent  today a force with firemen and cars.

 

 

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

For once we Swedes wish for rain!

If next summer will rain away – as Swedish summers often do, I guess we will be happy get along with it, remembering this summer? Oh, but humans have a short memory!

Although this summer though will be historic.

And we may have a new Government after the parliamentary election this autumn because of the current government incompetence to build and manage Sweden’s civil defense?

It seems to me today’s politician are all confused viewing the current world we live in and in this confused lack of visions and ideal, they turn the coat after the wind whatever it blows – and holds the grip on the rack on the wagon on the roller coaster where they feel they are, hoping to land on feet and with an outcome get something right.

Not with this, they did. Initially leastwise.

YB my pic June 27, 2017

In my living room I have a whole wall with big windows facing south, lovely view but in summers it gets unhealthy hot indoors – this summer up to about 88F! And I’m surely too old living in this heat for weeks. I was tempted yesterday to call for medical care, feeling scary sick! (And my son told me that only having the thought should force  me to go and actually see a doctor. So I guess he too – as I – nowadays experienced me to have become old and week and vulnerable!) ☹

But this autumn in November it will be a change and a new start (too) in my private life as I’m moving to a new flat, one more comfortable with elevator and in a ”better” area… And I will then have only three less sized windows and all of them to the east. No view! The current tenant told me when she showed us the living room and the balcony ”you can’t grow tomatoes here!” I understood that she experienced this as a limited quality of the apartment. But for me it sounded good! 😊

view from my livingroom November 24 2013

 

 

Posted in become old, borders, create life, living in the world, poems by vonnely, Poetry, Sweden view, Swedish "culture", Swedish conditions, web papers | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

What in Helsinki did they talk about?

Media and politicians in Europe and US feared what would happen when Putin and Trump met in Helsinki this Monday. Now, Putin is not the kind of diplomatic European leader that anyone would dare to bully, so the bull didn’t…

And then Trump gets critized for it ”back home”! He lost ”the battle”, so we are told! Putin was ”the winner”, both republicans and democrats yells in the public room. In that spirit is the criticism.

But it was not a battle, it was a meeting at best as a try to communicate. And in a communication there is no ”battle” and no ”winner” and no ”loser”.

But after the rush the outcome seems like an anticlimax. For once Trump didn’t treated an European leader disrespectful face to face and he didn’t talk shit behind the back of the other.

But were they able to communicate? Did they ever bothered to try? If it only ended in a grandstanding from the both, well! Putin is always Putin. And Trump is Trump.

Qute of Trump speech: “I’m here today to continue the proud tradition of bold American diplomacy. From the earliest days of our republic, American leaders have understood that diplomacy and engagement is preferable to conflict and hostility.”

😀   😀

(He has such humour, that guy!) But now the big question is: did Trump say ”wouldn’t” or ”would” on the press conference.

Now the ball can be round in US too

In Swedish media it claims Putin and Trump like each other. That is strange to me – too! Does fire like water? Does the grizzly likes the scorpion?

For me who lives in Sweden close neighbor to Finland, I noticed that Putin ended his speech with to apologize to the Finnish people for “some inconvenience ” having Russia at the other border. It’s must be such a euphemism for the Finns (who always stands with both feet deep in the historical ground), although that Putin apologies for anything at all is remarkable! I hope it will in reality mean more than polite words between the two tensed neighbors.

Quote from the ending of Putin’s speech: “And in conclusion, I want to point out that this atmosphere of cooperation is something that we are especially grateful for to our Finnish hosts. We are grateful for Finnish people and Finnish leadership for what they’ve done. I know that we have caused some inconvenience to Finland and we apologize for it.”

😀   😦  😀

Transcript: Trump And Putin’s Joint Press Conference

http://www.npr.org/2018/07/16/629462401/transcript-president-trump-and-russian-president-putins-joint-press-conference?t=1531912884707

Quote Trump answering reporter: “My people came to me, Dan Coates, came to me and some others they said they think it’s Russia. I have President Putin. He just said it’s not Russia. I will say this: I don’t see any reason why it would be. But I really do want to see the server but I have, I have confidence in both parties.”

 

“Would” and not”wouldn’t”!

 

 

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Manifestation at noon today in Stockholm

Today at noon there is a manifestation at the Ambessay of China in Stockholm. One of the speaker is Jojje Olsson. He’s an expert on China conditions and he’s the object for harassment and slander from Chinese authorities.

The manifestation is for Gui Minhai, kidnapped and today jailed for 1000 days. Jojje Olsson has a blogg, as informed from wordpress. But it is impossible to get to it on the address given in media. WordPress stopped me, and my web readers didn’t allow me.

It’s shocking. But I value my blog so much, I don’t dare to write more! But this address  to Jojje Olsson’s blog works  – for now…

http://inbeijing.se/bulletin/joe-olsson/

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Donald met Donald (cry to me)

Donald and Melania arrives to NATO Summit in Brussel July 10, 2018

Donald to meet Donald

“America, appreciate your allies – after all, you don’t have that many”

Donad Tusk

 

Trump and Stoltenberg breakfast meeting NATO July 2018

 

 

Donald wants to set the table

 


———————————————————————————————————-

The German football coach during the 50’s and early 60’s, Sepp Herberger, once said
“Der Ball ist rund und das Spiel dauert 90 Minuten…” “The ball is round, the game lasts 90 minutes. Everything else is pure theory.
———————————————————————————————————

American football

 

 

 

 

 

———————————————————————————————————-

Queen Elizabeth II in Sweden 1956

 

 


(Solomon Burke Cry to me)

When your baby leaves you all alone
And nobody call you on the phone
Doncha feel like crying
Doncha feel like crying
Well, here I am, my honey c’mon baby, cry to me

 

———————————————————————————————-

 

———————————————————————————————————-

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While the bear is cooling off

As long as the World Cup competition in soccer in Russia lasts, Putin is cooling off. The competitionen will unfortunately end coming weekend. And then after, it’s said Trump and Putin will meet.

But right now 11 to 12 July the NATO meeting is ongoing and Trump started up aggressvisily explaining that Germany is Russia’s hostage, that USA pays too much in everything, “whatever” and ending making a smoothie of all the different budget posts…

Thinking of Trump will meet Putin, the European leaders tries to handle his rage with the diplomat gloves on.

According to the Swedish newspaper Dagens Nyheter, NATO Secretary General Jens Stoltenberg also prefers to comment on Trump’s aggressiveness diplomatically. But to the same news magazine, the tone is more frank from Stockholm.

In Stockholm, research director Robert Dalsjö at Försvarets Forskningsanstalt FOI (= the Total Defense Research Institute), is more clear about the difference between Donald Trump’s rhetoric and reality of NATO.

Although it is a mad captain on the bridge, so is working in the engine room and the kitchen on board in accordance with established plans. But if the skipper is thinking about putting the ship on ground, that we don’t know. These processes are ongoing in parallel, so he explains.

The same newspaper writes in the same article about research director Robert Dalsjö:

Dalsjö is one of the authors of a study that earlier this year showed that NATO today can not defend its Baltic members against a sudden Russian storm attack. Russia is by far NATO when it comes to quantity, quality and speed in its vicinity. In two days they would reach Latvia’s capital Riga, was the FOI conclusion.

(quoted and translated from DN July 11, 2018)

Ukraine and the Crimea are so to speak in a different direction from the Baltic countries. And Russia has hardly any economic or military interests in the Baltic states reaching for the Nordic countries and Sweden. (Whatever the Swedish parties shouts to the Swedish people, now ahead of the forthcoming election in September 2018.)

If there is a threat from the Russian Bear, there could be that in all these countries, generations of Russian populations, who are discriminated and lack civic rights, like citizenship, like to use their russian language in public, like to vote in public elections, and like to be able to seek state jobs. They are treated as bad as the gypsies are in those countries, gets no respect from common people.

To compare with Sweden: when a prominent politician for Sweden’s largest racist party recently declared that Sami and Jews are not real Swedes, it became a scandal in the media and among people in the whole country, discussing if this person really should belong as an important member of the Swedish parliament.

But discrimination in the Baltics countries of Russians in the same way is okay among people there?

Then, to shout for NATO protection, what about that! How about to review and change their own attitudes and way to treat groups in the own country?

In Sweden, this conditions are never mentioned about our nearest neighbors. But our politicians in debates complains about migrants from Africa and beggars from Romania! What about that!

This, while every summer for years and years, criminals from East Europe comes to our country and attacks isolated living farmer couples, rob them and brutally murdering them with horrible torture methods. Every summer, the same! Likewise, we have every summer gangster gangs from Ireland who’s threatens defenceless old people to allow them to “renovate” their houses, asphalting their garden paths and roofing for staggering costs. It all reported and viewed as isolated events. The one summer after the other.

And of course they don’t have the skill of the craftsmanship!

Neither have nowadays our working politicians.

So what do we do, we ordinary people? Walk with Voltaire and do our own garden?

Whatever that means?

 

 

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And I miss talking to you

 

 

 

 

And I miss talking to you, see your smile that comes
instantly when you look at me, because it’s me. And
I miss sense the heat from your living body, moving
around in my rooms. And I miss your breaths blends
with mine as we talks. I miss all what’s you. I miss it
all, even though you’ve never been in my life on real.
You’re just a face on my laptop screen, which breaks
into an instant smile when you get your eyes on me:
I’m special to you. And very now I miss chat with you.

 

 

 

Posted in dreamers, loneliness, longing, love poem, love story, online romance, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Philosophizes about my (lack of a) love life

I plugged in the wrong end of a cord into my laptop and
the electrical system collapsed instantly. Now I sit here
without computer and energy, without passion and power
and without contact with anyone and I wonder if you really
sit at an internet cafe, watching the World Cup in football
on a big screen TV as you said before my laptop died? Or
if you’re fucking any nice looking girl with young thighs in
your close neighborhood? Yes, now and here and in this
moment? It all, as I know well I’m an aged and mellow lady
and an uncertain investment for an abstract future that may
never be true, love is one thing and the other “only needs”,
as you like to call it! I really wouldn’t have got this thought
about you, if I not had got this sudden thought for myself:
if I should’nt consider get a lover in this present, here and
meanwhile, while I’m still alive. As time goes by and in my
age you can die tomorrow, with or without connectivity to
life and love, you’re like a fantasy in the heat wave of July .

 

Wiyaala shows her bikini body

 

 

Posted in Africa, aging, Attraction, become old, body image, borders, loneliness, online romance, poems, poems by vonnely, Poetry, relationships, romance, sexuality, summer poem, summertime | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Now we got July

Höhässjning i Gissle i juli 1963. Fr.v. Jenny Månsson och Annie Månsson. De hässjar höet på rundhässjor. De är bättre när det regnar mycket. Modellen skall ursprungligen har kommit från Strömma i Sätila. Fotograf Dagny Bengtsson. Björketorps sockens hembygdsförening. bygdeband.se

The summer heat holds you by the throat
and presses you against its white endless
walls. The days floats away unwritten and
at night you are kept awake worried in your
bed’s twisted, sweaty sheets. So my friend,
now we got July! You are safely lulled and
wrapped into these floating summer days,
as if they forever will be. And winter cold is
just like a story told, no one to believe. I’ll
tell you how the story went: he vanished in
silence just like a dreamy and yet vaporized
snowflake somewhere over the vast sea –
that I never got to see. He may become to
a pale memory of what could have been.
What’s left is only a wonder as winter feed.

 

 

 

 

My son leaves my home on June 30, to hike the last vacation week back home to work in Stockholm

 

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Solitaire matters

 

 

 

 

Well, you say we have love but from what
I see, you have your friends and I have yet
another round of solitaire and my constant
bad and hurting hip. But I don’t have you.

You tell me calmly you’ll love me no matter.
But I see I have my desires and despair all
for you, while you have taken your desires
elsewhere and whatever I have, it’s not you.

Come clean you told me I should be more
patient and forgetful and I said to be patient
and forgetful is just what I am not. And I still
play solitaire and you do whatever you do.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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